That was Then, This is Now
by TanyaPotter
Summary: Sequel to New Life! Raven has been in ME for 3 years now... Elerossë gets to know his new family, goes back to earth and more! Plz R&R!
1. Chapter 1

That was Then, This is Now

Meeting More family

By: TanyaPotter

AN/I know this is short, but I wanted to get it started….

Raven was silent as he, along with Elrond, Elladan, Elrohir, and some guards, rode silently into the boarders of the golden wood.

He sat straight and tall on his horse; a big, black stallion that was the color of his natural hair, and had an attitude matching his.

Raven didn't look left or right, only ahead. It had been three months since he arrived here; in Earth time, it would be February.

But three years had passed to him. Things hadn't gotten better since that talk with his grandfather, only worse. That talk had made his grandfather unconsciously think he could dig into Raven's life… and his past.

Raven didn't even think he realized it, but it bugged him all the same. He had never been ashamed of his past, and he still want, but he wasn't exactly proud of it either.

The people here, the elves; they did not know death, nor the need to cheat and steal, to fight and to lie, to deceive, to kill, to survive above all. Some knew maybe one person, two tops, who had been close to that they had lost, because of the last war with Saron. But it still wasn't the same; they had died valiantly, honorably, in battle. Their deaths were something to be proud of, something to celebrate as well as to mourn.

He was scared, loath as he was to admit it, of them finding out about his own past, about what he had done; about the people he had killed.

And now they were going to see his great grandparents, one of which was said to be an extremely powerful witch. It was told that she was able to get into a person's mind as easily as most people walked or talked.

And that freaked him out.

They would arrive there by sunset. He never had the wish to be anywhere or anyone else so badly.

Raven gazed at the beautiful city with a blank expression. They met with the guards hours before. One, named Haldir, escorted them back, while his brothers and men went back to the trees.

Then he saw them and, god, the stories he heard didn't do them justice. They were stunning, with rivers of blond hair cascading down their backs, sharp, chiseled features accented by it.

His grandmother contained an air wisdom and power in her eyes that was almost on par with Leander, but not quite.

They greeted Elrond, and his uncles before they moved over towards him. Raven stood tall, expression completely closed, green eyes sharp. His hair had green tips to match his eyes, and was about three inches long on the back and top, while his bangs hung to almost six inches long. The short part was spiked up with a freezing charm, while the bangs hung straight down his face.

His piercings flashed with silver studs or hoops, taking away from the fact that he didn't have any eyeliner on.

To his surprise, Galadriel drew him into a warm hug. He stood stiff, not moving towards or away from her. He narrowed his eyes when a voice entered his head.

'You need not be afraid, my child. We are your family. We will not hurt you.'

She stepped back and looked him in the eyes with a kind smile. At the same time, she proclaimed to the others looking at anything but the pair, "Come, we shall have dinner in the family hall."

In his head, she promised, 'We will talk later, little one.'

Later that night Raven was summoned to Galadriel's rooms. Haldir escorted him there, and didn't bother to hide his distaste at what the prince looked like. Raven sneered back and followed behind the arrogant Marchwarden.

Galadriel was waiting for him, and invited him into a big, comfortable room with a big fire place on one side. She dismissed Haldir and led Raven over to sit on a comfy chair and sat elegantly across from him.

"It is good to finally see you, Elerossë." Raven scowled slightly at the name, but not as much as he used to.

"Ahh," she said knowingly, "You do not like that name?" Raven continued to stare at her silently.

She sighed softly, stood, walked over to him, and kneeled in front of him. She gently took his hands and studied his face.

"Would you rather me call you Raven?" she raised an eyebrow softly, but not mockingly.

Raven was confused. He had not expected his grandmother to be like this, so he remained silent. She sighed again, and stroked his cheek.

"We can talk again later, I am sure that you're tired, Indyo. (1)"

Raven nodded silently and stood, exiting the room the way he came, not looking back to see the single pain filled tear that fell down her cheek.

(1) Indyo means 'grandchild'

WELL? FEEDBACK TO LET ME KNOW YOUR STILL READING THIS!!! Please!

Short I know, but I wanted to get it started….


	2. Another Visit

Chapter Two,

Another Visit

Two weeks passed slowly. Raven treated all of his family the same, with a cool, closed off, impartial demeanor. He took meals with them when it was required of him, and spent the rest of the time in his room, or in his trunk. Sometimes, though, he would walk alone through the gardens or forests. He was drawn to them.

He was on his way to an evening meal, as was required of him. His hair was left in long, gravity-defying spikes, tipped in a vibrant orange. He had continued to forgo eyeliner, as there was no point in putting it on.

Nothing had really happened to him during his time in Loren so far, except talk of Saron being back. He didn't really see the big deal, as he didn't know who it was, but his family was talking about it being really bad.

He sat to the right side of his grandfather. The table went like this.

Celeborn

ElrondAdviser1

ElladanHaldir

ElrohirGeneral

Elerossë (Raven) Arwen

Galadriel

The meal was almost through when Raven felt his bond tingle. His head rose expectantly, gathering questioning looks from those around him, but ignored them. Less than two seconds later a column of flame appeared in the hall.

Instantly bows and swords were pointed at it. When the flames died down they saw a man with a sense of power radiating from him unlike any in the hall. Raven stood to greet him, but stopped, a suspicious look coming over his face.

"Leander." He intoned, walking slower over to the vampire.

"Raven," Leander smiled, pulling the elf into a half hug. "Get dressed." He polished off his command with a smirk.

Raven groaned, stepping back, not moving to take the red bundle of cloth in the vampire's hands. "I'm good, thanks." He declined. Leander raised an eyebrow.

"Now." He demanded.

Raven glared at the vampire, refusing to back down from this argument, while still not taking the blood red robes being held out to him. Leander stared him down, red-hued eyes locked on flashing green.

After a minute Raven relented and took the bundle, stalking out of the room. When he was gone, Leander allowed a small smirk to cover his stunning features. He turned and looked at the wary elves.

He moved with the grace of a cat as he went over to stand in front of Elrond. "Lord Elrond." He said, bowing his head only slightly.

"Count Leander." Elrond nodded back. "I can assume you'll be taking my grandson?"

"If you don't mind." Leander answered mockingly, but covering it well.

"Of course not. Now, this is my…"

When introductions were over, Leander told them he had a gift for them. He was led to an empty room were he cast an old vampiric spell that would allow them to watch Raven, or Elerossë, as they called him, when it was safe. They wouldn't be able to watch him all the time, but at least that was better than nothing Leander told them.

He felt sorry for them, and this was how he could make it up to them. He knew how cold Raven could be, and how much he could hurt others without batting an eyelash. At least with this spell they could know he was safe.

Raven returned a few minuets later, robes and boots on, but otherwise looking the same. He saw the stern look Leander was watching him with and ignoring the curious looks the elves were sending him.

"Raven…"

"Leander…" he mocked. The two locked eyes and a seemingly silent conversation took place. Finally, Raven's face twisted into a slightly nervous look that could be seen around the room, sighed, and ran a hand through his frozen hair, causing the charm to cancel. His raven hair fell into a sexy layered style around his head.

Leander raised an eyebrow again, but this time Raven wouldn't relent. Leander made an aggravated noise in his throat and motioned at Raven, causing the orange in his hair to darken to its natural color.

Leander smirked at the annoyed look Raven shot at him, and held out a circlet with a band made of pearls and a ruby hanging in the front2. Raven paled when he saw it.

"This isn't the one I normally wear." He commented softly.

Compassion came into Leander's eyes. "We need you to sit in for Rico. Just for this meeting, of course. We haven't been able to get a hold of Ahern3, and this meeting is really important."

Raven took a deep, calming breath, masked his face, hardened his emerald eyes, and nodded. Galadriel moved up to him, and looked kindly into his eyes. "Cormamin niuve tenna' ta elea lle au'."4

Raven didn't answer, but moved to Leander and grabbed his arm, leaving Middle Earth in a whorl of flames, looking a true prince for the first time

THE END

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LOL, JK.

They landed in the foyer of Leander's mansion. They walked silently into the meeting room. When they entered Raven saw his supposed grandfather, Albus Dumbledore, along with some of the other Order, including the Potters. There was also the entire English vampire council, and representatives from other countries.

Raven followed Leander over to sit at the head of the table, on Leander's right side.

He saw Charlie watching him, clearly wanting to talk with him, and the same look on his 'twin'.

"We have a problem." Leander started gravely. "We have received word that Voldemort will be launching his final strike somewhere within the next two weeks. This is not a joke. From what we have heard, we are talking the last effort, final battle, end, whatever you wish to call it, and it is soon."

Sharp breaths were drawn in, and soft whispers could be heard.

"What can we do to stop it?" Albus Dumbledore asked determinedly.

1 I don't know who the adviser is… so if anyone could tell me, I would be really grateful.

2 You can see the circlet on my profile page.

3 Rico's backup for the council.

4 My heart shall weep until it sees thee again

Ok, this ISN'T going to end with Voldy's death… it isn't centered on him, ok? PLEASE tell me what you guys think.

VOTE (Who will be with Raven)

Legolas

Glorfindel (as was suggested)

OC

Haldir

Boromer

Other(suggestions??)

So far the vote is

Legolas: 27

Haldir: 3

Glorfindel: 1


	3. AN

I made a mistake with the vote. Those possible are:

Legolas

Haldir

Glorfindel

Borimer (sp?)

Faramir


	4. Concert

Chapter Three

Concert

LAST TIME

_They landed in the foyer of Leander's mansion. They walked silently into the meeting room. When they entered Raven saw his supposed grandfather, Albus Dumbledore, along with some of the other Order, including the Potters. There was also the entire English vampire council, and representatives from other countries. _

_Raven followed Leander over to sit at the head of the table, on Leander's right side. _

_He saw Charlie watching him, clearly wanting to talk with him, and the same look on his 'twin'._

_"We have a problem." Leander started gravely. "We have received word that Voldemort will be launching his final strike somewhere within the next two weeks. This is not a joke. From what we have heard, we are talking the last effort, final battle, end, whatever you wish to call it, and it is soon."_

_Sharp breaths were drawn in, and soft whispers could be heard. _

_"What can we do to stop it?" Albus Dumbledore asked determinedly._

The royal elves were gathered around the room, relieved to see a picture. Elerossë was walking into an old worn out house, surrounded by others just like it. He didn't bother to knock, but rather just walked in.

Immediately guns and knives were pointed at him. When everyone realised who he was, with himself dressed in his normal way, he was pounced on by a group of people. He had to reach down and grab onto two shoulders' as he was lifted up.

,',',',',',',',',RAVENS POV,',',',',',',',',

Raven looked down to see Ross and Justin holding him up. He smiled slightly and told them to put him down. When he did, Kyle walked over to him and stared him in the eye.

Suddenly they both smirked/smiled and grabbed each others hand, pulling the other into a hug. 'Long time no see dude.'

'Hell ya.' He laughed.

'OH DUDE!' Justin yelled. 'You can do the concert with us now!' Raven frowned at him in question. 'Yanno, the concert… that we put on for winning nationals…??' he explained at Ravens blank look.

Ravens expression cleared up and he nodded. 'Ya, isn't Dom doin' that?'

'Hey, its cool man, we wouldn't be there if it weren't for you. 'sides, I wasn't part of winnin' it, that was all you guys.' Dom answered from the side. Raven looked at Dom's face for a minuet, before smirking and nodding at the other teen.

'You stayin' in tonight, brah?' Ross asked.

'Naw man, I gotta go out, been locked up to long.' Laughs were made around the room, and Ross nodded. The room started clearing out when Kyle and Raven started talking.

'You coming back later?' Kyle asked his friend.

Raven nodded reassuringly. 'Course, we got stuff ta catch up on… just, ah, don't wait up, right?' Kyle smiled, and nodded in understanding.

'A'ight, man, see ya tomorrow?' he asked

'Ya, see ya dude.'

,',',',',',',',',',',',',',',',',

Bright flashing strobe lights… grinding sweat covered bodies… a crowed room rocking with the base of a heavy metal song…

And in the middle of it was a teen with wild chestnut hair spiked with ice blue, sleek, muscular, flawless pale skin, marred only with the tattoos placed decoratively across his flesh. Half closed lids reveling flashing emerald eyes, and only black and blue TRIPP pants, slung low on his waist with beat up old converse hidden by hem of the pants.

He was completely in sync with the rhythm of the song, moving fluidly, drawing many eyes in the club. He had a sensual grace, but whenever someone got to close, ran hands in unwanted places, or kissed his bare flesh, the man would spin lithely away to continue dancing a few feet apart. He continued his dance even when an old man walked to stand in front of him. 'Can I help you.. grandfather?' he added mockingly after a brief pause.

'You can begin with stopping this foolishness.' Dumbledore said sharply. Raven's eyes opened to lock with the blue of the man who claimed to be his family.

'What _foolishness_ would that be?' he asked sarcastically. Dumbledore gestured sharply at his half clothed form.

'Do you really think Bill would appreciate seeing you flaunting yourself like this?'

Raven slid smoothly to a stop. His cold eyes locked on the old mans before he spun and walked to the bar. 'Wild Turkey' He ordered sharply. Jim, the bartender, nodded and moved to get it for him. "Harry, forgive me, it wasn't my place to say that.' Dumbledore said behind him.

'Forget it.' He said carelessly, downing his drink.

'Harry…'

"If you keep hanging around, people are gonna start thinking im some old-man whore.' Harry said thoughtfully. 'Not really a rep I want… can give the wrong impression, ya know?' a cocky smirk was spread across his face.

'Can we talk?' Dumbledore asked quietly, not reprimanding him for his language.

'That's what we're doing now, ain't it?

'Harry..' Dumbledore said, warning creeping into his voice.

'Yes, _Albus_?'

Dumbledore took a deep breath and let it out slowly. 'Do you mind leaving old man, your kinda fuckin' up my mood.'

'Harry, that is enough. Now, are you going to stay here acting like a vagabond, or are you going to come with me and talk to your parents?'

'One, my parents are dead, and the Potters… and you… aren't related to me at all. Two, What the fucking hell is a _vagabond_?'

Dumbledore closed his eyes and counted to ten. 'We are still your family, we adopted you, magically. You cant just forget about that.'

'I cant just forget??' he asked incredulously. 'Umm, remind me, because apparently I forgot, just who the hell left me with… _them_?'

'Yes, we did, and it was a mistake, but you can't change the past.'

'So stop trying.' Raven said evenly. 'This..' he said sweeping an arm around the pounding club, '..is me. You cant change it, so stop trying.' He mocked.

With a mournful sigh, Dumbledore left the club, giving in for now, but not forever.

,',',',',',',',',',',',',',',',',

TBC

To answer some questions…\

Legolas is gonna be with Harry… he won by a landslide.

The Potters will be worked out in the next chapter

Voldie will go in the next few

Manuel will be back

Harry is still a badass punk

ME will be back in like, 5 or 6 chapters?? Maybe…

The fellowship has already happened.

Legolas Gimli, and Aragorn are still teaching, because its only been 3 months on earth.

Any more questions, ask me…


	5. A Son?

Chapter 4

A SON??

LAST TIME:

"Harry..." Dumbledore said, warning creeping into his voice.

"Yes, _Albus_?"

Dumbledore took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Do you mind leaving old man? You're kinda fuckin' up my mood."

"Harry, that is quite enough. Now, are you going to stay here acting like a vagabond, or are you going to come with me and talk to your parents?"

"One, my parents are dead, and the Potters, and you, aren't related to me at all because of that. Two, What the fucking hell is a _vagabond_?"

Dumbledore closed his eyes and counted to ten. "We are still your family. We adopted you, magically. You cannot just forget about that."

"I can't just forget?" he asked incredulously. 'Umm, remind me, because apparently I forgot: Just who the hell left me with… _them_?"

"Yes, we did, and it was a terrible mistake on our part; you can't change the past, no matter how much either of us would like to."

"So stop trying." Raven said evenly. "This," he said sweeping an arm around the pounding club, "is me. You can't change who I am, so stop trying." He finished.

With a mournful sigh, Dumbledore left the club, giving in for now, but not forever.

,',',',',',',',',',',',',',',',',

Elrond couldn't help by feel gratified that Elerossë treated him better than the other man he had thought of as his grandfather. He knew it was wrong, but if anything, it showed that there was hope

for them as a family.

They were still watching when Raven left the club and appeared back at the house he had been at earlier. They kept watching, soaking up the chance to learn more about their grandson who was so closed off. Elrond only left the room after the boy went and lay down in an unused bed.

Raven woke up the next day knowing instantly where he was. A smile crept up on his face, and warmth filled him when he looked around and saw that they hadn't changed a single thing in his room.

A dagger lay innocently on the small table next to his bed, where it had rested every night since they had moved in there. A shirt was half pulled out of the drawer.

He sat up, causing the blanket to pool around his waist, and swung his feet over the side of the small bed. He leaned towards the side and opened the small drawer in the table. Lying on the top was a picture of Bill and Raven.

Raven was seated comfortably in Bill's lap facing the camera; his arms were behind wrapped around Bill's neck in a show of possession and love. They were both smiling. The picture wasn't moving, but the emotions coming from the photo were nearly palpable.

With a small, wistful smile, Raven carefully put the precious piece of paper back in the drawer. He stood and stretched, his body arching like a feline's. He continued around the room, grinning or frowning when he came across certain items he had forgotten about.

He found his silver Zippo lighter with a dragon showing on the front (picture on my profile page); a knife he had been ready to sharpen when he left; some of Bill's clothes and other items that he had left; he found some old shoes and some other knickknacks…

With a sigh, he moved over to pull on some more comfortable cloths.

The week following passed in a haze of talking, clubbing, fighting, sometimes in that order. But, as much as he was relieved to be back with his gang, who had instantly fallen back into routine of following his lead, things just weren't the same.

Sure, he acted the same, heck, everyone did, but he left for too long. He wasn't used to this life anymore. He tried to deny this fact to himself, but he failed.

He wasn't as confident as he used to be here, and he found himself longing unconsciously for the quiet of the woods rather than the hustle of the big city.

He told himself that it was just because he wasn't accustomed to being back in the thick of things, but he knew, deep within his conscience, that this wasn't the whole reason. With Rico and Bill gone, it didn't seem worth it.

The gang could take care of themselves, with Ross taking over managing them. Kyle could have done the job, but he refused to lead without Raven with him.

Manuel didn't need him, and sure, he missed his somewhat dad, but… He wasn't truly family. The same with Leander.

But he had real family, and as much as he hated to admit it, even to himself, he had gotten use to having them around. Hell, he had spent three years with them!

He shook his head, trying physically knock the treacherous thoughts out of his head, and walked out of the small room.

Almost three hours later Raven was in front of Manuel's penthouse apartment.

He made it all the way up to the second to top floor (Manuel owned the top two) with no problems. This was where Manuel stayed most of the year, only going to the manor when he wanted (or needed) to get away from the city, but couldn't leave completely.

Raven noticed that he was getting lost in thought a little too much lately, and moved forwards to ring the bell. Jason opened the door, surprise overcoming his features when he saw who it was, and tucked the gun he had in his hand back into his beltline.

"Hey… When did you get back?" he asked, putting an arm around the teen's shoulders, leading him further into the spacious suite.

"Erm," Raven said, rubbing a hand over his still tired face, A couple days ago?" he replied, only half joking.

"Ahh, well, that's a good thing your just coming around. Things have been kind of… odd… around here…"

Raven looked at his friend suspiciously, a frown forming on his handsome face. "Odd, how? That dumb ass didn't get himself arrested again, did he?" he questioned.

Jason sent the younger man an amused look, blue eyes glittering with mirth. "No, not odd like that." he replied, trying to stifle his laughter.

Raven curiosity continued to grow, a fact that Jason seemed to relish in if the glee in his face was any indicator. "Raven!" a deep, silky voice cut in from the stairs.

"Manuel!" Raven exclaimed as he looked up to see the older man walking down the steps. Suddenly, Jason didn't seem to enjoy the moment anymore, as he excused himself back to his own apartment swiftly.

Raven watched him go in confusion. When the door closed he looked back at Manuel for an explanation.

Five minuets later Raven was sitting on the sofa, a dumbfounded expression on his face. 'So… you have a…'

"Yes."

"And he's…"

"Mmmhmmm."

"And your going to…"

"Of course." (1)

"Right…" Raven exhaled. "Wow... I didn't take you for the fatherly type…" he murmured quietly.

"HEY!" Manuel said offended. "I think I'll make a excellent father!"

Raven laughed quietly, but not mockingly. "So... How old is he?"

"Seventeen." Manuel quietly responded.

Raven nodded softly. "Hey," he started, "I have to go, but do you want to meet up for lunch one day? Before I leave again?"

Manuel nodded firmly. "Of course, you don't even have to ask. How about day after tomorrow?" he inquired, a twitch in his facial muscles threatening to break into a smile.

"Yeah, sounds good. See yah." He waved to Manuel as he left the suite, his eyes catching a look of the teenage boy that looked stunningly similar to the man he was just talking to. He had his wavy dark hair and build, and the same dark endless eyes, eyes that were currently watching him warily as he closed the door and left the lavish rooms.

TBC 

Well? It's four pages long!

Believe it or not, reviews do actually make me write faster- hinthint.

Thanks to bakaonna2003 for beta'ing this for me. Any mistakes left are my own.

1 the actual conversation would go like this:

"_So… You have a son."_

"_Yes."_

"_And he's here now?"_

"_Mmmhmmm." _

"_And you're going to get custody of him?"_

"_Of course."_

"_Right…"_


	6. Concert Part Two

Chapter 5

Concert

Disclaimer... I don't own anything LOTR, HP, or any of the lyrics in this story!!! Their NOT MINE!!

WARNINGS!! THERE WILL BE CHARACTER DEATH AND ANGST IN THE NEXT FEW CHAPTERS!!!

A/N all the lyrics I wrote out in this story tells his emotions… you can skip them, but then you wont understand what he's feeling…

LaSt TiMe

_Five minuets later Raven was sitting on the sofa, a dumbfounded expression on his face. 'So… you have a…' _

"_Yes."_

"_And he's…"_

"_Mmmhmmm."_

"_And you're going to…"_

"_Of course." (1)_

"_Right…" Raven exhaled. "Wow... I didn't take you for the fatherly type…" he murmured quietly. _

"_HEY!" Manuel said offended. "I think I'll make an excellent father!"_

_Raven laughed quietly, but not mockingly. "So... How old is he?"_

"_Seventeen." Manuel quietly responded. _

_Raven nodded softly. "Hey," he started, "I have to go, but do you want to meet up for lunch one day? Before I leave again?"_

_Manuel nodded firmly. "Of course, you don't even have to ask. How about day after tomorrow?" he inquired, a twitch in his facial muscles threatening to break into a smile. _

"_Yeah, sounds good. See yah." He waved to Manuel as he left the suite, his eyes catching a look of the teenage boy that looked stunningly similar to the man he was just talking to. He had his wavy dark hair and build, and the same dark endless eyes, eyes that were currently watching him warily as he closed the door and left the lavish rooms. _

**"ARE YOU ALL READYYY!!!!!!!!!"**

Screams, stomping, whistles… they all filled the air. A huge hall, filled to the brim with teens and young adults, most wearing livid dark colors and intense makeup, literally rocked with the force of the noise. On stage, three boys and one girl stood behind their respective instruments, them too, wearing the fury filled clothing. The voice that had spoken came from everywhere and nowhere at once. The source of the musical, silky voice couldn't be found.

Tens of thousands of eyes searched the room, probing for the hidden person. Suddenly, almost a minuet later a spotlight focused on the most stunning man they had ever seen. His dark, raven colored hair tipped in metallic blue, hung to his shoulders, bangs falling into the elvin face. His emerald green eyes stood out surrounded sharply in black kohl stood out piercingly from the flawlessly proportioned face, and perfect red lips curled into a mocking smirk.

Hoops and studs ran up the lengths of his ears, a spike stuck sharply from his lip, and when his mouth opened you could see a flash of silver from the darkness. Raven walked forwards from the shadows from where he had stood hidden.

At once music exploded from speakers all around the room as the band simultaneously started playing loud pounding music.

"Eternal the kiss I breath  
Siphon your blood to me  
Feel my wounds of your god  
Forever rape mortality  
I smell of death  
I reek of hate  
I will live forever  
Lost child pay the dead  
Bleeding screams of silence  
In my veins your eternity"

(Bloodline- Slayer)

…Rang loud thought the room after almost a minuet of heavy playing. Raven could remember when he had written that song. It had been when he had stayed with the vampires for almost two weeks and he really got a feel for how they lived. Raven had showed it to the band when they were picking the songs, and they loved it.

Where should I start  
Disjointed heart  
I've got no commitment  
To my own flesh and blood  
Left all alone  
Far from my home  
No one to hear me, to heal my ill heart, I

Keep it locked up inside

Cannot express  
To the point I've regressed  
If anger's a gift, then I guess I've been blessed, I

Keep it locked up inside  
Keep my distance from your lies

It's too late to love me now  
You helped me to show me  
It's too late to love me now  
You don't even know me

Breaking a part of my heart to find release  
Taking you out of my blood to bring me peace  
Breaking a part of my heart to find release  
Taking you out of my blood to bring me peace

(And One- Linkin Park)

…Was next. Followed by…

Prison gates won't open up for me  
On these hands and knees I'm crawlin'  
Oh, I reach for you  
Well I'm terrified of these four walls  
These iron bars can't hold my soul in  
All I need is you  
Come please I'm callin'  
And oh I scream for you  
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin'

_Chorus:_  
Show me what it's like  
To be the last one standing  
And teach me wrong from right  
And I'll show you what I can be  
Say it for me  
Say it to me  
And I'll leave this life behind me  
Say it if it's worth saving me

Heaven's gates won't open up for me  
With these broken wings I'm fallin'  
And all I see is you  
These city walls ain't got no love for me  
I'm on the ledge of the eighteenth story  
And oh I scream for you  
Come please I'm callin'  
And all I need from you  
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin'

_Chorus_

Hurry I'm fallin'

All I need is you  
Come please I'm callin'  
And oh, I scream for you  
Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin', I'm fallin'

_Chorus_

Hurry I'm fallin'

(Savin' Me- Nickelback.)

Raven's voice pleaded for the (he thought) oblivious family to help… to save him… as he unknowingly begged them for help.

Change my attempt good intentions

Crouched over  
You were not there  
Living in fear  
But signs were not really that scarce  
Obvious tears  
But I will not  
Hide you through this  
I want you to help  
And please see  
The bleeding heart perched on my shirt

Die, withdraw  
Hide in cold sweat  
Quivering lips  
Ignore remorse  
Naming a kid, living wasteland  
This time you've tried  
All that you can turning you red

Change my attempt good intentions  
Should I, could I  
Here we are with your obsession  
Should I, could I

Crowned hopeless  
The article read living wasteland  
This time you've tried  
All that you can turning you red  
but I will not  
Hide you through this  
I want you to help

Change my attempt good intentions  
Should I, could I

Here we are with your obsession  
Should I, could I

Heave the silver hollow sliver  
Piercing through another victim  
Turn and tremble be judgmental  
Ignorant to all the symbols  
Blind the face with beauty paste  
Eventually you'll one day know

Change my attempt good intentions  
Limbs tied, skin tight  
Self inflicted his perdition

Should I, could I  
Change my attempt good intentions  
Should I, could I  
Should I, could I

(Wasteland- 10 years)

'I, uhh, lost someone a bit ago that was pretty special to me…' Raven started, breathing heavily. 'This songs for him."

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost  
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time  
But I'm too young to worry  
These streets we travel on will undergo our same lost past

I found you here, now please just stay for a while  
I can move on with you around  
I hand you my mortal life, but will it be forever?  
I'd do anything for a smile, holding you 'til our time is done  
We both know the day will come, but I don't want to leave you

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time  
But I'm too young to worry (a melody, a memory, or just one picture)

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost  
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

Newborn life replacing all of us, changing this fable we live in  
No longer needed here so where do we go?  
Will you take a journey tonight, follow me past the walls of death?  
But boy, what if there is no eternal life?

I see my vision burn, I feel my memories fade with time  
But I'm too young to worry (a melody, a memory, or just one picture)

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost  
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

Trials in life, questions of us existing here, don't wanna die alone without you here  
Please tell me what we have is real

So, what if I never hold you, yeah, or kiss your lips again?  
Woooaaah, so I never want to leave you and the memories of us to see  
I beg don't leave me

Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost  
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over

Trials in life, questions of us existing here, don't wanna die alone without you here  
Please tell me what we have is real

Silence you lost me, no chance for one more day _x2 then continues in the background_  
I stand here alone  
Falling away from you, no chance to get back home  
I stand here alone  
Falling away from you, no chance to get back home

(Seize the day- Avenged Sevenfold)

The completely raw emotion in his voice, the words poring straight from his broken soul, the notes his fingers were strumming on his favorite electric guitar… whatever it was, the crowd was into it. There were body surfers, a huge mosh in front of the stage as the concert went on… people were alternating between, jumping, screaming, stomping, fighting, surfing, occasionally they had lighters light proudly over their heads… they were lovin' it.

More songs were played; hypocrite- Korn; By Myself- Linkin Park; Break Stuff-Limp Bizkit **(If you go into my homepage, which is my myspace, the break stuff is my profile song right now, and image him saying exactly what the guy is saying)**, and some others and the finished off the night like this…

"This is gonna be our last song, and im gonna tone it down a bit. This was written a few years ago, and I neva let anyone see it… well, it fits my life again right now, so… this is 'Inside my head' (Big Dume)

'My soul, it, slips through my cloths

Heart falls out as I decompose

My life, it ends right here, on this dark day

How I wish that I could stay just one more day

So you…can see…inside my head

Cocaine and cigarettes have bled into my brain

And they keep me wide awake so I can cry today

And the songs I wrote are buried on my soul

But they keep my warm when my heart turns cold

Now you... can see… inside my head

Why is it so hard to see myself when I cant see right through you

Im sick of this, im sick of everything I stand for

Now ya wanna come… ya wanna know… ya wanna see what's inside of me

Then I will... give myself to you…. **Go on and hate me now**

Ohhh ohhhhh, oh ohohhhhh (repeat)

My life it ends right here….

The fight it ends right here….

To night I can loose all control,

An my cries you can not here

My sighs you will not here

My life has not stopped control

Now you... can see… inside my heaaadddddd

10:30 AM the next morning and they were finishing a b-ball game out on the court Raven hadn't seen in so long. The city was moving around them… cars honking, shouts filling the polluted air. Raven was completely focused; sweat shinning on his face, clothed in baggy shorts and a slightly loose, thin white t-shirt. A slight smile, not a smirk, was visible on his stunning face.

Some of the other gang members were sitting or standing along the old grungy chain link fence, while they stood, half without shirts, scattered across the court. Suddenly in a fraction of a second everything changed.

A gunshot split the air, then another and another and another. They dropped to the ground, completely driven by the street survival instincts they had all had to adapt to. An eternity later, in reality less than two seconds, some of the gang and leaned up, firing their own guns back.

It was over in fraction of a minuet, and they cautiously stood, calling out reassurances. Raven looked around, his heart stopping in his chest when he saw Kyle lying on the ground, blood poring from his chest. The world blurred, fading out of focus, his ears deafening as he stared into his best friends glazing eyes.

He bear-crawled over to him, huddling over the still body, shaking hands searching for a pulse. He shook his head in denial, his hands moving to try to stop the never-ending flow of red liquid. He didn't notice the liquid splattering him, coating his hands in the warm juice, just that he had to stop it.

CPR only brought about blood gushing from the wound in ribbons, the heart remained still. He shook his head, denying what was happening.

He finally noticed hands trying to pull him away, the grief stricken voices calling his name in panic. The world came back into focus, and everything outside their little court was undisturbed. His heart hardened, eyes turning so hollow and cold that Ross took a weary step back.

'Ray…' he tried to say, not managing to get anything else out. Raven didn't answer… he shook off the hands, leaning forward to gently brush his hand down his best friends face, closing the lifeless blue eyes.

He stood with such grace; it was unnatural even amongst the elves. He grabbed Kyle's gun, walking away without another word in the direction the car had gone.

The yelling, the traffic, children's laughter… it was unheard, hazy in his subconscious as he walked, the picture of an avenging Angel, dark blood splattered across his face, staining his white shirt with sprays and splatters and drops of blood...

...and a world away a women feared his soul was broken beyond repair.


	7. Aftershocks

Chapter 6

Aftershocks

_A gunshot split the air, then another and another and another. They dropped to the ground, completely driven by the street survival instincts they had all had to adapt to. An eternity later, in reality less than two seconds, some of the gang and leaned up, firing their own guns back. _

_It was over in fraction of a minute, and they cautiously stood, calling out reassurances. Raven looked around, his heart stopping in his chest when he saw Kyle lying on the ground, blood poring from his chest. The world blurred, fading out of focus, his ears deafening as he stared into his best friends glazing eyes. _

_He bear-crawled over to him, huddling over the still body, shaking hands searching for a pulse. He shook his head in denial, his hands moving to try to stop the never-ending flow of red liquid. He didn't notice the liquid splattering him, coating his hands in the warm juice; He just he had to stop it. _

_CPR only brought about blood gushing from the wound in fountains, and the heart remained still. He shook his head, trying to deny what happened. _

_He finally noticed hands trying to pull him away, the grief stricken voices calling his name in panic. The world came back into focus, and everything outside their little court was undisturbed. His heart hardened, eyes turning so hollow and cold that Ross took a weary step back. _

_"Ray…" he started, but did not manage to get anything else out. Raven didn't answer. He shook the blood off his hands, leaning forward to gently brush his hand down his best friends face, closing the lifeless blue eyes. _

_He stood with such grace; it was unnatural even amongst the elves. He grabbed Kyle's gun, walking away without another word in the direction the car had gone. _

_The yelling, the traffic, children's laughter… it went unheard, hazy in his subconscious as he walked, the picture of an avenging angel, and a world away a woman feared his soul was broken beyond repair. _

Raven walked thought the city silent as a ghost. His naturally pale skin splashed with blood, the contrast of red on white becoming morbidly beautiful. His thin white t-shirt was covered in big splotches of the crimson liquid. His magic unconsciously stretched out, leading him towards the cowards. One thing about his gang that he was proud of was that they didn't do hit and runs. It was sick, cowardly, shameful, disgusting… disgraceful.

It seemed only a matter of seconds when he arrived at a small, abandoned building, door missing, windows boarded up. Raven would have snorted in disgust if he could have worked up any feeling except pure rage.

He walked silently into the room, observing the scene he entered. They hadn't even noticed him… most were standing around, or sitting on the few seats in the room celebrating the 'victory', but one stood out. He looked average age for street kids, thirteen or fourteen, and he stood apart from the rest. His face was pale and sick looking as he leaned against the wall.

Raven instantly knew he was the one whom fired the shot that killed Kyle. It was obviously his first kill; he probably hadn't even shot at a person before.

He could have laughed at their stupidity. None of them had visible weapons on them, oblivious to the idea of someone coming for revenge. He raised the gun, calling attention to himself.

"I really wouldn't do that if I were you." He said calmly to the couple of people reaching for their guns. They shot at him with a thought, his magic reacting to the intense feelings coursing through his veins. Eye's widening, they stepped back in alarm.

Raven smirked at their reactions, relishing in their fear. "Now… how 'bout we have a little _chat_."

"See, I normally wouldn't have a problem with a small… _gang_… like this, but you made a mistake."

"Do you know, the guy you shot was named Kyle." The kid in the back paled more if it was possible. "Yeah, it's different when they have a name, isn't it?" Raven shot him a malicious look. "Well, Kyle happened to be very important to me. Like a little brother you could say. And I take my family very seriously."

"Let me ask you a question. Do you know who I am?" An older guy stepped forward. He looked maybe nineteen or twenty, and seemed vaguely familiar to Raven.

"Raven, goes by Corinthos when it's needed, sixteen years old, MIA leader of the _fabled_ 'Dragon' gang, Panthers' _prodigy_, and an all around pain in the ass." He said sardonically. Raven's brows furrowed, his brain working to identify the man.

His eyes glowed when he realised who it was. "Randy(1)?" he said quietly. "Well well well, still alive? That's a surprise." Randy's eyes flashed with unknown emotion. Raven pointed Kyle's gun at his forehead, stopping him when he tried to take a step nearer to him. He sent the older teen a mocking look, eyes challenging him. A smug, blood-thirsty smirk spread across his elfin face when he didn't move.

"If you were smart…" he spoke to the whole room again, "You would have at least waited until I was gone again, but then, I'm not here to accuse you of being smart," His face was screwed up in a sneer. "So you don't have to worry 'bout that."

He moved forwards to stand in front of the kid in the back. He didn't know what happened. All thoughts of controlling himself had fled in the face of his brother's murderer. When he realised what was happening, he saw the kid in a bloody heap on the ground, barely breathing and amazingly enough, without a bullet wound. His gang had come in sometime without him knowing, and were holding themselves astonishingly well in the midst of their grief, though maybe that was the reason- they were working out all the pain and anger at these people in their violence.

Minutes later, the fighting had stopped. His own kids had various cuts and scrapes… one lay on the floor, holding his stomach in agony. It was one of the younger kids… maybe thirteen years if he was lucky. Blood seeped through the kids fingers, pooling with the other gang's blood from their fallen members. He lifted the boy, Aaron, and carried him out of the building.

The door opened quickly, drawing Manuel and Troy's attention. Manuel gasped when he saw Raven. He stood, rushing over to him immediately. "Where's my car?" he asked in a flat voice.

"Ray, what happened?" he asked. He had waited for his makeshift son to show up for their lunch, but wasn't to worried when he didn't because of how he lived.

"Where is my car?"

"It's, uhh, in the garage… what the hell happened?"

Raven ignored the questions, choosing instead to go get his keys from where he had left them on the rack. "Where are my keys?" He demanded when he found them missing.

"Not there."

"Obviously. Where are they, Manuel?"

Manuel reached into the pocket of the jacket he was wearing and pulled out a key ring with two simple keys attached. Raven reached out a hand for them, his ire growing when they weren't given to him.

"Fornirmi le mie chiavi god-damned, Manuel." He spat out in Italian. (Give me my god-damned keys, Manuel.)

"No."

"Mi fornisce la mia chiave!" (Give me my keys!)

"No."

"Perchè la scopata è voi che vi comportate come questo?! Mi avete dato quell'automobile, la relativa miniera! Fornirmi le mie chiavi fucking!" He demanded. (Why the fuck are you acting like this?! You gave me that car, its mine! Give me my fucking keys!)

"Non li desidero ottenere hurt." (I don't want you to get hurt.)

"Devo fare questo." (I need to do this.)

"Per favore" Manuel implored softly to the teen. (Please)

"Prego, Manuel, prego mi fornisce la mia chiave!" It was Raven's desperate pleading that finally seemed to break Manuel's will and allowed him to release the grip he had on the little metal ring. He handed it over softly, whispering in the young mans ear at the same time he wrapped the blood soaked teen in his arms.

"Essere sicuro." (Be safe.)

And so Raven was gone… soul, body, and mind searching desperately for some semblance of something, anything, to help him hold on- to help keep him sane just a little bit longer.

1: Randy was Panther's lover. I might go more into it. He's not really important.

2: Troy is the name of Manuel's son.

3: I used a translating site for the Italian, so im 99.9 sure at least some of it is wrong.

4: I really should be updating other stories, but I hate it when authors leave stories hanging at a point like that, so I'm being nice. I might do another chapter for this one to finish off the little angst part before I work on another story…

**TEASER-** BECAUSE I'M IN A GOOD MOOD!

"Please hold still young man. You've been in a serious car accident; we need you to hold still until we can make sure there aren't any fatal injuries on your person right now. You're a very lucky guy. It's a miracle that you're alive right now…"

Thx to BakaOnna2003 for fixing all my cruddy mistakes. Any left are my own.


	8. Accident

Chapter 7 

Last time:

"_Non li desidero ottenere hurt." (I don't want you to get hurt.)_

_"Devo fare questo." (I need to do this.)_

_"Per favore." Manuel implored softly to the teen. (Please.)_

_"Prego, Manuel, prego mi fornisce la mia chiave!" It was Raven's desperate pleading that finally seemed to break Manuel's will and allowed him to release the grip he had on the little metal ring. He handed it over softly, whispering in the young mans ear at the same time he wrapped the blood soaked teen in his arms. _

_"Essere sicuro." (Be safe.)_

_And so Raven was gone… soul, body, and mind searching desperately for some semblance of something, anything, to help him hold on- to help keep him sane just a little bit longer. _

Raven's POV

The lights blurred with the speed of the flying object, causing blues, reds, yellows, all the colors of the city nightlife to blend together. Adrenaline pounded through his veins, blood pounded in his ears. The gas pedal under his foot, the slightest pressure or release bringing the best and the worst effects, and for the two or so minutes behind the wheel he was completely free… invincible. There's no pressure or pain… no hate or anger… no love or joy… nothing. Just complete control.

He didn't know what happened. Hell, he was not sure that he wanted to know what happened. It was perfect… gods… for the first time in years he felt completely free. There wasn't even anything there when he crashed… a straight stretch into the final turn and he was home free. Then he lost control. The wheel jerked under his steady hands…the car lunged to the right… he remembers a wall… he thought… and then nothing.

He was not afraid, or worried, or panicking… He was calm. It's like he was still flying. He didn't try to stop the collision, or steady the car, but welcomed the darkness that clouded his vision and brought the sweet relief he'd been longing for.

Normal POV

Raven's eyes opened the slightest bit. He saw the flashing red lights, heard the sirens and immediately tried to sit up.

"Please hold still young man. You've been in a serious car accident; we need you to hold still until we can make sure there aren't any fatal injuries on your person as a result of the mishap. You're very lucky. It's a miracle that you're alive right now." A woman said, gently but firmly trying to push him back down.

He resisted her hands, pushing himself up on his elbows. His cloudy green eyes scanned the area, taking in the small group of people standing to the side watching. His gaze caught the shattered glass littering the road, and he followed the trail spray, dread filling his eyes.

They landed on a huge hunk of shredded, twisted, totaled metal. His eyes cleared and filled with disbelief.

"Just how fast were you going?" the women asked disapprovingly when she saw where his attention was focused.

"Bite me." Raven rasped out right before he started coughing. His body curled defensively into itself until he was little more than a small seizing ball on the black assfalt. They kept coming long after Raven noticed the blood coating his hands and dribbling down his chin.

He tried to stop, to still the convulsions and calm the hacking tearing through his throat. He felt a needle enter his arm, and tried to squirm away though the unwillingness of his body, but couldn't get far.

Almost instantly his body stilled, blood covering himself. He saw the woman looking down at him before his vision blackened again.

He awoke again to see the blur of a blond figure standing over his bed. He reached for the nonexistent knife under his pillow, and enough curses ran thought his head to make Manuel blush.

He moved to roll off the thin cushion, recognizing the sterile smell of a hospital. Before his feet could hit the ground soft, but firm hands pushed him back down. His hand shot out to grab the thin wrist. A harsh, but still musical voice whispered harshly in the silent.

"Stop! 'Tiz only Legolas." Raven froze for less than a second before he regained his bearings and pushed Legolas off him, scooting back to lean against the headboard.

"What the fuck are you doing here?!" Raven demanded of his former professor.

"Albus asked me to come get you out of here. He said to bring you to the school, and you would be healed at the lady's hand."

"Albus can go fuck himself." Raven said. "Do you mind leaving? I'm trying to heal." He mocked, stretching his arms out on either side of himself.

Legolas took a small breath, never breaking the calm facade covering his face. "It would be more prudent for you to come back to the castle and be healed by others with more skill."

Raven raised an amused eyebrow at the elf. "You into politics or somethin'? 'Cause that's some pretty talk there."

"If you would accompany me, we need to be leaving in order to arrive on time."

"I don't live by time… I didn't think any of you elf types did either." He commented not moving.

"If you would get up…" Legolas said again, face cold.

"Nope, sorry- Doctor's orders, I'm not suppose to leave the bed. You know, because I'm trying to heal." He repeated.

"You would heal much faster with the use of magic." Legolas tried.

"Well, sure, but where's the fun in that? 'Cause if I spent all the time getting healed right away, I wouldn't have nearly the pain tolerance I have… plus, I'd probably be dead by now…" he trailed off thoughtfully.

Annoyance finally showed itself in the older elf's blue eyes, if only for a second before it was gone, and Raven felt a satisfied smirk falling across his stunning features.

Legolas opened his mouth to respond when the door handle jingled. His mouth shut and he silently moved into the shadows, invisible unless you knew where he was. The door opened, and Raven laid back down, closing his eyes and evening his breathing to appear sleeping.

"Raven." A rougher voice said gruffly in the blackness. His eyes snapped open to look at Jason.

Jason looked at him, not speaking again. His head tossed to the side, a gun held loosely in his hand, gesturing him to leave. He immediately swung from the bed, leaving the room without a sound. The door closed again and the blond stepped forwards, annoyance clear on his beautiful face.

XOXOXOXOXOX

WOW sinfully short, I know- but it's an update. I'll try to get more out, but I have to be off in five minutes… please review, I got an all time low for this fic last chapter. I was kinda expecting more of a response to this…


	9. Rage

DISCLAMER: I dont own anything... lyrics arn't mine.

Hey guys, sorry it soo frickin' long… I've been swamped, then my muse took a trip to DP… which I have another chapter done for, but im writing this instead of typnig that… anyway's, you can all thank Merrymow for having this now…

Chapter 8

Choices

LAST TIME:

"_Well, sure, but where's the fun in that?? Cause if I spent all the time getting healed right away, I wouldn't have nearly the pain tolerance I have… plus I'd probably be dead by now…" he trailed off thoughtfully. _

_Annoyance finally showed itself in the older elf's blue eyes, if only for a second before it was gone, and Raven felt a satisfied smirk falling across his stunning features. _

_Legolas opened his mouth to respond when the door handle jingled. His mouth shut and he silently moved into the shadows, invisible unless you knew where he was. The door opened, and Raven laid back down, closing his eyes and evening his breathing to appear sleeping._

_"Raven." A rougher voice said gruffly in the blackness. His eyes snapped open to look at Jason. _

_Jason looked at him, not speaking again. His head tossed to the side, a gun held loosely in his hand, gesturing him to leave. He immediately swung from the bed, leaving the room without a sound. The door closed again and the blond stepped forwards, annoyance clear on his beautiful face then. _

XOXOXOXOXOX

Looking forwards, Raven felt slightly weirder out to be in the same position as he had the night before. Manuel stood before him, Jason and Troy off to the side, trying to remain unnoticed. Manuel moved forward, eyes taking in the damage to the boys face. A large gash covered his forehead, going from above his right eye to his cheekbone. His left jaw was covered in scratches from where he landed on the shattered glass, and his left cheek bone was covered in a large black and blue bruise.

His left arm was in a sling, and his right leg was wrapped thickly in gaze from his knee to his ankle. A cut split his bottom lip where the silver hoop had been ripped out. "Raven…" he stared, but trialed off, not knowing what to say. Raven's eyes held his for a moment before they dropped to the floor in a single show of pain and defeat. That sign was all it took for Manuel to one again pull the resisting young man into his warm embrace. Raven struggled for only a moment before his hands fisted the soft cloth of Manuel's button-down shirt. His forehead dropped to the older mans' strong shoulder and his eyes and jaw clenched tightly closed.

His brow's furrowed, body taunt trying to keep away the emotions; not yet ready to acknowledge that he had lost yet another person he loved. Manuel finally broke the silence an unknown time later. His voice was surprisingly soft and soothing for a man of his stature. "Come on, you still have some cloths in your room upstairs.(1)" He said gesturing to the hospital pants he had conned the nurse into bringing him, rather than the usual gown.

Raven nodded, moving from the reassuring form he depended on more than he wished to. Manuel seemed to know that, and led the teen with a supportive hand on his shoulder up the stairs.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

Raven stayed with Manuel long enough for his elvish and vampiric healing to kick in and heal his wounds. He got to know Troy a little better and found out that the boy didn't know his father until he had showed up. He wasn't use to living like he was now.

Troy's mother had been a middle class women that was a one night stand with Manuel. He could tell that Troy was a little jealous of the relationship between Raven and Manuel, but he didn't really know what to do about it. Now Raven stood in a club... his band behind him. Kyle's place was held by Dom, with Raven taking the lead again. None of them could bring it in themselves to replace Kyle yet, so they just had them, instead of finding the next one to move up in the gang.

Moving up to the stage, they took their places in front of the mikes. Raven had his guitar in his hands, a strap around his neck, as he strung the first note.

"_Pain  
Without love  
Pain  
Can't get enough  
Pain  
I like it rough  
Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all" _

He sang the first part softly. His fingers strummed the cord gently, leaning forwards so his mouth was close to the mike.

_You're sick of feeling numb  
You're not the only one  
I'll take you by the hand  
And I'll show you a world that you can understand  
This life is filled with hurt  
When happiness doesn't work  
Trust me and take my hand  
When the lights go out you'll understand_

His rich voice held a knowing tone, his body moving slowly with the rhythm. Suddenly his voice boomed, voice yelling out..

_Pain  
Without love  
Pain  
Can't get enough  
Pain  
I like it rough  
Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all-x2_

The voice lowered again, a seductive darkness filling the melodic cords.

_Anger and agony are better than misery  
Trust me I've got a plan  
When the lights go up  
You'll understand_

Suddenly, his voice changed, he shouted the lyrics, voice filled with pain and hate and love.

_Pain  
Without love  
Pain  
Can't get enough  
Pain  
I like it rough  
Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing  
Rather feel __**PAIN**_

All the emotions he had been feeling in the past three years that locked deep in himself, refusing to acknowledge came out. His face was morbidly twisted, beautiful and horriable at the same time.

_I know, I know, I know, I know that you're wounded  
You know, you know, you know, you know that I'm here to save you  
You know, you know, you know, you know, I'm always here for you  
I know, I know, I know, I know that you'll thank me later_

Again, his face smoothed out and his voice calmed.

_Pain  
Without love  
Pain  
Can't get enough  
Pain  
I like it rough  
Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all_

Rage and hate twisted his face, as he screamed the lyrics of the last verse, fingers moving rapidly and harshly over the cords… the tempo increased and the thumping of the music came out heavy, bodies moving with the beat.

_Pain  
Without love _

_Pain  
Can't get enough  
Pain  
I like it rough  
Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all  
Rather feel pain than nothing  
Rather feel __**PAIN**_

(pain- 3daysgrace.)

The last word was screamed, and when it was over, Raven had to take a deep breath to calm some of the roaring emotions filling him.

The next song when much the same way. Emotions pored out of him, filling the lyrics.

_They say freak,  
when you're singled out.  
The red it filters through. _

So lay down the threat is real,  
When his sight goes red again.  
Seeing red again,  
Seeing red again.

This change,  
He won't contain.  
Slip away to clear your mind.  
When asked what made it show.  
The truth he gives into most.

So lay down the threat is real,  
when his sight goes red again.

They say freak when you're singled out.  
The red it filters through.

(Chevelle- the red.)

More songs followed…

_Looking back at me I see  
That I never really got it right  
I never stopped to think of you  
I'm always wrapped up in  
Things I cannnot win  
You are the antidote that gets me by  
Something strong  
Like a drug that gets me high _

(Chorus)  
What I really meant to say  
Is I'm sorry for the way I am  
I never meant to be so cold  
Never meant to be so cold  
(x2)

To you, I'm sorry about all the lies  
Maybe in a different light  
You could see me stand on my own again  
Cause now i can see  
You were the antidote that got me by  
Something strong like a drug that got me high

(Chorus)

I never meant to be so cold

I never really wanted you to see  
The screwed up side of me that I keep  
Locked inside of me so deep  
It always seems to get to me  
I never really wanted you to go  
So many things you should have known  
I guess for me theres just no hope

And

_I've been changin' but you'll never see me now  
(I've been changin' but you'll never see me now)  
Now I'm blaming you for everything _

No more holding it in  
How many years can I pretend  
Nothing ever goes the way it should  
No more sitting in this place  
Hoping you might see it my way  
Cause I don't think you ever understood  
That what I'm looking for are the answers  
To why these questions never go away

Chorus  
I'm so far away  
I've been changin' but you'll never see me now  
I'm so far away  
Now I'm blaming you for everything

No more waiting for the end  
Of every day that I will spend  
Wishing that I only had a choice  
No more pushing you away  
Cause I will be busy watching things going my way  
Never looking back on this anymore  
Because what I'm looking for are the answers  
To why these questions never go away

Chorus

I've been changin' but you'll never see me now  
Now I'm blaming you for everything

I'm so far away

Hey hey watch me wave  
Goodbye to yesterday  
Nothing left in my way  
Hey hey I've been saved  
With sun shining on my pain  
Getting me through this day  
Hey hey watch me wave  
Goodbye to yesterday  
Nothing left in my way  
Feels so good to say

Chorus

Now I'm blaming you  
I'm so far away

And_…_

_So you found out today your life's not the same  
Not quite as perfect as it was yesterday but  
When you were just getting in the groove  
Now you're faced with something new  
And I know it hurts and I know you feel torn  
But you never gave up this easily before  
So why do you choose today to give it all away _

Well it's not so bad y'all  
Together we all fall  
Just as long we get up we'll stand tall  
We shouldn't waste another day  
Thinking 'bout the things that we forgot to say

I'm hittin' back y'all  
Kickin' these four walls  
Just as hard as I can til I can't crawl  
I won't waste another day  
With all these silly things  
Swimmin' in my brain

Chorus  
There's no giving up now  
Do you really want to give this all away  
Can't you ever see things in a different way  
Somedays  
No giving up now  
Such a beautiful thing to throw away  
You should think things through  
Over and over again  
All over again

So your scars fade away  
You soaked up the pain  
A better person 'cause you lived through those days  
And now you know what it's like to prove  
You can overcome anything that gets to you  
Well it's alright  
We're sayin' our goodbyes  
To the past and everything that ain't right  
We won't waste another day  
With all these silly things in our way

Chorus

I know we have given  
All that we can give  
When there's nothing to lean on  
Well, I remember this  
All we make of this lifetime  
Is always here within  
And remembering that's why  
We should never give in

Chorus

There's no giving up now

By the end of the night, Raven was feeling calmer than he had in years. His shirt had been removed at some point, and his skin, and green-spiked hair was damp with sweat.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

1… Manuel's apartment is a penthouse suit… its on the top two floors, with stairs going up, and with roof access. There is four bedrooms… Manuel's, Raven's, Troy's and an extra… Jason lives across the hall in the other pent house in the building… they both share the roof access.


	10. Arrested

Wow, long time no see…. I hope what's in it makes up for the wait!! ;-)

WARNING: Abuse and attempted rape! Don't bitch about it!!

Chapter 9

Arrested

Middle Earth- watching Raven

It had been hard, watching his grandson go through that life. Celeborn stood in the corner of the room, arms wrapped securely around his wife as he observed his grandson witness the death of a friend, as he almost died in a scrap of metal and glass and blood. They watched him release more emotions with his songs than he ever released in the three years spent with his family. They watched him release more hate and pain and rage than any elf should be able to bear alone.

He looked to his family stationed around the room, his son-in-law standing with his own son's on either side of him, his daughter standing a little apart with her own family; Estel and Eldarion stood with her. He looked at Eldarion with pride. The elfling was now 17, born just two years after Elerossë. He stood tall, shoulder length black hair of his mother, and stunning gray eyes of his father; he would make any elf proud.

They had arrived just yesterday, this being the first time they viewed the room- Estel only having arrived back from his position on earth. It was with a sigh that he looked back to his great-grandson.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Raven sat cross-legged on the edge of an abandoned building roof. It was relatively tall, standing on the edge of the city.

He rested at the corner, overlooking the nightlife of the darker part of Phoenix. It was about 11:30, still warm, with a gentle breeze blowing his black hair softly into his face.

His green eyes were resting sadly on the neon lights, hands relaxed in his lap. He had been there since before sunset, watching the sky progressively darken.

Raven blinked, head turning as the old, broken door opened and Ross walked over to him. He came to a stop behind him, leaving Raven to watch him over his shoulder.

"It's not your fault." He spoke softly, voice almost lost in the breeze. Raven snorted in amusement.

"What's not my fault?" he asked mockingly.

"Don't." Ross said sharply. "Don't do that." Raven looked at him questionly. "That!" he said, "Pretending like nothings wrong, like nothing happened."

"Nothing did happen."

"Your best friend just died!! How can you act like it didn't mean anything to you!" he exploded. "Acting like it was nothing doesn't make it go away, it doesn't make him come back."

Raven's mocking eyes turned cold, glairing into the blue above him. "People die all the time Ross. One more doesn't matter."

"Who are you trying to convince?" He shook his head, voice strengthening now. "We need you back at the house.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Raven followed Ross back to the house silently. They arrived to find most of the gang gone (Not unusual) but some of the kids and a few teens in the living room. One of the teens, a boy of 14, nodded up the stairs.

They went up and found three more young teens standing around another. A boy lay on the bed, 15 years old. His dark hair was sticking to his sweaty face, body shaking, hands clenched. He was curled around his stomach, eyes tightly shut.

The boy's name was Shawn O'Connor, and had been apart of the gang since he was in charge. Shawn was one person who had fought him all the way- Being sarcastic, fighting his decisions… Raven didn't know how many times he had come back beat up, how many times he himself had punched the kid.

"Raven!" A young boy shouted, appearing from around the taller ones. "You have to help him, he's really sick!" The boy, Michel, was only seven. He had been abandoned by his parents almost two years ago, and was one of the few little kids that was with them, one of the few that managed to survive.

"He's not sick." Raven said, leaning lazily against the door frame.

"Yes he is!" Michel defended, small hands on his hips.

Raven shook his head with a small smirk. He moved forward, kneeling in front of the boy. Mike had been on the streets for an unknown amount of time before he was found before Kyle, sick, hungry, and dirty.

He had lived with them two years, had seen the gang wars, had seen the deaths and fights and pain. He had seen his savior, his mentor shot down and killed, and he still, somehow, managed to keep some of his childhood innocence.

Raven mentally shook the thoughts from his head. "You're a tuff guy, aintcha Mike?" He questioned playfully. The black eyes glared defiantly at him. "Ya gonna beat me up?" He questioned playfully.

A small smile finally came to the kids face. Raven stood up, hands casually resting in his pockets. He looked at the miserable figure on the bed. "Withdrawal's a bitch, ain't it, O'Connor."

Through his discomfort and pain, he still managed to rasp out a response. "Fuck y… you… Corinthos…" He spat, throat raw. Raven looked at the kid, reduced to pained whimpers and lips bitten in an effort to remain silent.

"Watcha been takin'?" he asked, resigned. Even if he wasn't, technically, the leader anymore, he knew they all looked to him for protection.

Another teen, Jeff Vik, answered him. "He's been takin' some newer shit from the dealer. Pain pills… Since he got knifed."

"Since he got… That was almost four months ago." Jeff stared at him silently.

Raven shook his head, pulling his phone from his pocket. It was just a cheep, pre-paid one, but worked when he needed it. Pushing the '2' on speed dial, he held the small object to his ear.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Raven walked silently out of Manuel's apartment building. Hidden in his pocket was a small bottle of an illegal liquid that would flush Shawn's system. It wouldn't feel good, but would be better than dieing in the midst of convolutions as the result of his body being cut off from the drugs. He made his way into the subway, mentally mourning the loss of his car.

Nothing happened the whole way home. He made it all the way home, and left again to dispose of the bottle. It wasn't until he was only a block from where he was trying to get that it finally happened.

He had been walking, head up, eyes raised. It was something he had learned at a young age. No matter what you're thinking about, where your mind is, you look weak, you'll get hurt. Keep you head up, don't look like a target, and you're less likely to be one.

It was his fault in the end; he should have been paying attention. All's he could do was let out a grunt of pain as he was pushed face down into the gravel. He moved to turn and defend himself, but his wrists were grabbed, handcuffs snapped tight around them before he could.

He was dragged roughly to his feet, and could feel blood running from the new cuts on his face. "What the fuck are you doing!" he demanded, looking from the corner of his eye to the cop standing behind him.

"Raven…" He said smugly. "I can't say im surprised to find you here. Thought I have to admit, we were starting to think you were lying in an alley somewhere."

"Sorry to disappoint." He spat sarcastically.

"Oh, Im not disappointed. You're much more fun alive."

Raven growled as he was cruelly pushed forwards, shoulders protesting as they were wrenched upwards.

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Celeborn gasped, arms tightening around the slim waist of his bonded. They could only watch in mounting horror and hopeless despair as the night progressed…

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

Raven sat in a grey interrogation room, leaning causally against the hard metal chair he was in.

The same cop that had arrested him sat across from him, two others with him. He knew all of them from other arrests. The one that arrested him was name Jack, the one to his left was Mark, and the other was Chris.

"You do realize that it's a felony to have this in your possession." Chris said as more a statement than a question, holding up the small bottle, only traces of the substance visible in the bottom.

Raven stayed silent, hands resting loosely in his lap, wrists still cuffed.

"And that having it is warrants a minimum three years in prison?" Mark added. At Ravens continued silence Jack stood furiously.

"WHO GAVE IT TO YOU!" He shouted furiously, hands slamming down on the bolted-down steel table as he leaned over, getting closer to Raven. Raven tilted his head to the side, the small smirk on his face further enraging the man.

His large hand raised and crashed against the porcelain skin of the young man. Ravens head whipped with the force of the slap. He straightened his head slowly, his pink tongue coming out to lick the trickle of blood coming from the corner of his lip. He raised his hands, his finger wiping the remaining blood from his chin. He looked at the red stain on his finger in disdain, wiping it on his dirty pants.

Finally he looked back at the officer. The man had a pleased expression on his twisted face, and the other two hadn't moved.

"We know where you got it, all's you have to do is admit it and we'll let you go." He said calm again. "Your confession is all we need to put him away. Think of it as you plea-bargain."

"You want a confession?" Raven asked peacefully. The cops leaned forward, hungry expressions on their faces. "The truth is, I found that when I went swimming… it was the strangest thing." He said evenly.

Jack moved around the table, leaning over his shoulder. "There are other ways to make a man confess." He whispered in his ear. In an instant the cop's hands were ripping at his shirt, mouth attached to his neck.

He was fighting back before he fully realised what was happening. Memories of his uncle flashed through his mind as he felt his arms being restrained by the two other men.

He swung his legs up, catching one of the cops, and allowing him to pull his hands free. He laced his hands together and swung at the other. Raven smiled at the satisfying sound of metal hitting flesh, as the cuffs came away from Chris' head bloody. Jack backed away, looking at his two injured co-workers.

Raven stood, fists clenched. He was now facing them, his shirt nearly shredded. A purple mark was rising on his neck where the smooth skin had been bitten, and nail marks were visible beneath the rips of the shirt.

"You're going to prison boy, do you really think anyone will care if we use you tight ass before you do? All's you can hope for is one power taking you as his bitch instead of being passed around." Jack looked his slim body up and down and lustful smile on his lips. "With that body though, I don't think it will be a problem for you."

Jack moved forward, ignoring Ravens' raised fists. He ran a finger lightly down the hand shaped bruise on his cheek. Raven pushed his hand away in disgust. Jack laughed moving over to the black recorder/tape player on the metal table.

He pushed a button and a song filled the room. "We can add assaulting officers to the list of felonies." He said amiably as he turned back to look at the defensive boy. "Tell us if you want to change you confession." The three cops left the room together.

_when you're in prison, don't turn the other way  
keep your back against the wall  
when you're in prison, don't turn the other way  
do not bend at all_

oh don't pick up the soap, pick up the soap  
it's bad for you

oh don't pick up the soap, pick up the soap  
someone will be waiting there for you

when you're in prison be sure to stay awake  
always lie upon your back

when you're in prison be sure to stay awake  
keep you from attack

oh don't be no one's bitch, be no one's bitch  
it's bad for you

oh don't be no one's bitch, be no one's bitch  
they won't help you make it through.

when you're in prison, don't turn the other way  
follow what i say to do.

when you're in prison, don't turn the other way  
you can make it through  
you can make it through  
you can make it through

Raven's laced hands came down at the black box, slamming it from the table and into a concrete wall. His body shivered in disgust as he fell down into his chair. He rested his elbows on the cold table, hands fisting in his black hair. His eyes clenched as he swallowed tightly.

His mind was constantly flashing back, the feel of hands covering his unwilling body… he struggled to find reality, choking back the feeling of sickness he could feel in his throat…

Tbc.


	11. Freedom

I KNOW!! Super long wait! Im so sorry! I could tell you all my excuses, but you would prolly rather read the chapter. LOTS OF ANGST! Please tell me what you think!!

Question of the day….

How important dose a person have to be to be considered 'assassinated' rather than just 'murdered??'

Chapter 10

Freedom

Raven's laced hands came down at the black box, slamming it from the table and into a concrete wall. His body shivered in disgust as he fell down into his chair. He rested his elbows on the cold table, hands fisting in his black hair. His eyes clenched as he swallowed tightly.

His mind was constantly flashing back, the feel of hands covering his unwilling body… he struggled to find reality, choking back the feeling of sickness he could feel in his throat…

XXXXXXXX

Two days had passed since Raven had been arrested. He hadn't given the evidence they wanted, and in return, had a few more bruises. Nothing more had been done to him, yet.

Now, two days later, he sat in the same hard metal chair, staring at the brick wall, waiting for his hourly interrogation. His brows furrowed after almost an hour and a half of being alone.

Two hours later, and he was shooting looks at the one way glass occupying a wall. Time continued to pass, and after almost ten more hours of uninterrupted silence, Raven fell into a fitful sleep for the first time since his arrest.

He was awakened as the metal door slammed open against the wall an unknown time later. His head jerked up, hazy eyes focusing on the cop storming over to him.

Waking completely, Raven was satisfied to see the bruise surrounding the still-healing cut across Chris' cheek bone.

His green eyes showed his confusing as Chris roughly grabbed his arms, jerking them up. He held them high against his back as he harshly unlocked the hand cuffs adorning the slim wrists.

Raven cautiously pulled his sore arms in front of his body, rubbing the chaffed and bloody wrists. "Get out!" Chris snarled.

Raven was on his feet in a flash, backing warily away from the enraged man. He went to ask what was happening, but he didn't have to before Chris spat it at him.

"Jack's gone. Know where he went?" he asked, eyes flashing with rage. "Goddamn stubborn man. Wanted the thrill of bringing down Manuel Corinthos himself. Kept the fucking evidence hidden. Great idea Jack!" he said. Raven wasn't even sure who he was talking to anymore. "What the hell are you still doing here??" He raged, looking back that the boy. "We can't keep you without evidence. GOD! What idiot keeps the evidence hidden from everyone!! GET OUT!" he didn't yell, but it was close. Raven immediately left, not willing to risk his freedom.

He hurried through the station, ignoring the hateful looks he could feel at his back. Finally he reached the exit doors and pulled them harshly open. He paused at the full sun shinning down on his face. The pause only lasted a second. Raven turned to where he knew the subway was, not looking back to see hate filled eyes watching him.

XXXXXXXX

Surprised exclamations were heard as Raven pushed open the door to their house.

He looked into darker interior, peering at the faces sitting around the room. They were clearly as curious about him as they took in his ripped clothing and tired appearance.

A voice called out of the darkness. "We thought you were gone for good."

Raven looked in the direction of the voice and saw Ross staring stonily back at him. "You should know me better than that." He replied after a pause.

Ross shook his head at gestured toward the T.V. One of the younger kids nodded and quickly turned it on.

A news reporter appeared, perfectly groomed, talking impassively into the mike.

"This new assault against gang activity is expected to yield great results. Already thirty suspected gang members have been found and arrested since the mayor's unexpected press release late yesterday morning.

Again, for those of you just tuning in, the mayor has launched an all-out war to get gangs off our streets, and make this a safer city to live in. For more details, you can tune in at our 5:00 airing, or go to the website displayed across the bottom of your screen. Back to you Will."

The kid shut off the T.V. as the news report ended. The gang stared silently at Raven.

The silence in the room was deafening. "Didn't think we'd be seein' ya again." Someone finally spoke up.

"Come on, can't be that serious. They pull shit like this all the time. They gotta make it look like they doin' somthin."

Ross snorted defensively. "Four years for being caught consorting with a know gang or gang member. Then ya gotta add in everything else they can fuckin pin on ya. Assault, MIP, dealing, Aiding and Abetting, arson, battery, fraud, drug distribution, DWI, hate crimes, theft, manslaughter, murder, money laundering, prostitution, rape, hell, it's a fucking crime to be seen with a 'gang member' now!"

"But," a small voice called out hesitantly. All eyes focused on a little girl- one of the four girls living with them. "We don't do that stuffy, mostly, so they cant get us in trouble for it, can they?" The girl's name was Ember, nine years old. She had only been on the street for a few months. She, like Raven, had been abused until she finally got the courage to run.

"Do be fucking native!" Ross spoke harshly, obviously mad. "It doesn't matter if we did it or not, if they can pin it on us, we're fucking screwed."

"That's enough!" Raven snapped at Ross. "So what, your just gonna sit around here and complain? Or are ya gonna fuckin' DO somthin' about it?!!"

"And what the hell are we suppose to do?!" Ross stood from his reclining postiton. "Go out and get are asses arrested?! NEWS FLASH! The fucking pigs have most of us on photo id."

"So what? Your gonna sit here for the rest of your lives?? Hide from 'um? Congrats! They just fucking won!"

Complete silence followed Ravens last statement. "What do you want us to do?" Sheri asked boldly.

Ross looked at his girlfriend in disbelief. His head turned back to Raven, eyes narrowed in rage. "You ain't our god-damned leader anymore! You can't pull this shit!"

"What 'shit' would that be?? Not hiding from this like a fucking coward??" he spat, looking pointedly at Ross.

"Self preservation."

Raven shook his head in disgust. He looked at them all in turn, some looking him square in the eyes, others avoiding his gaze. Finally, his eyes locked with Ross'. They stared mutely at each other. The house was completely silent.

Raven spun and stalked up the stairs to where his room was. His sudden, unexpected movement caused most of the people in the room to start after such a grave stillness.

XXXXXXXX

Raven and a small group of teens walked into the loud music shop. When he had come back down stairs, and left the house, the group had surprised him by following silently.

He hadn't explained his plan- he hadn't needed to. The group following him were his most loyal friends. A month ago, Kyle and Ross would have been beside him. So much had changed…

A tall black man came over to them. Raven recognized him instantly as the owner of the shop, a man named Devon. Raven instantly got to the point. He started talking, showing all the charm and manipulation he had picked up in his life.

"Raven, I can't let you have that much stuff. You've heard the news, that's like, ten years in prison if I did this."

"No, it's like, ten years in prison if you got caught doing this. You wont, I guarantee it." Raven said back calmly.

"And how can you do that? I cant risk this man!"

"Look, We just need the stuff for a little while, and I give my word that you'll have it ALL back, in perfect condition, and wont get nailed for aiding and abetting."

"Ya, because no one will notice that most my stock is missing for a few days!"

"You won't get in trouble." Raven said again.

Devon looked squarely into the green eyes, one of the few able to do it. "Fine, but if I get screwed, so do you."

"Deal." Raven said in satisfaction.

XXXXXXXX

Sheri asked Raven to talk to her on the way back. The rest of the group silently broke off, leaving the two in private. They were on a relatively empty side street, branched away from the main hustle of the city.

Sheri stopped at faced Raven squarely, and he took in her appearance fully for the first time in days.

She looked tired, with dark rings around her eyes, and none of the makeup she generally wore. She opened her mouth once, then twice to start, but nothing came out. Finally she let out a choked sob. "Im sorry!" she said in defeat.

Raven eyes widened in concern. He placed his hands gently on her shoulders. "Hey," he said softly. "What's going on?"

She looked at him with watery blue eyes. "I-im pregnant." She whispered.

He looked at her silently. "Im sorry!" she exclaimed.

His eyes went cold at the exclamation. "What are you gonna do about it?" he asked coolly.

A tear flowed out of her eyes at his coldness. "I don't know!"

"What happened?"

It took her a few seconds to start, but when she finally did, she couldn't stop the words from flowing brokenly out of her. "I tried to stop them! I s-said no!! They wouldn't stop!! It hurt so bad!! Ray, please! I didn't want this to happen! Im only fifteen!" Her words started to jumble together as she spoke faster and faster, but the message was obvious.

His eyes lost the coldness, and he pulled her to him. She clung to his clean shirt desperately, sobs escaping her. She wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face in his neck and hair.

She finally calmed down and pulled back slightly at his nudging. "When did this happen?" he asked softly, not wanting to ask, but needing to know.

"A-a couple months ago." She said shakily.

"Did you tell anyone else?"

"NO!" she said, suddenly fierce. "It was my own fault! I shouldn't have been so weak, I shouldn't have…" she was cut off as he pulled her to him again.

He pushed her back again and looked into her red eyes. "It wasn't you fault!" he cut her off as she started to speak again.

XXXXXXXX

The group stood in the room, watching the scene with sadness felt by all. Celeborn stood with his son-in-law, and all three grandsons. No one else was in the room this time.

Elrond watched helplessly as the young girl, only a baby by elf standards, broke down. He had gained a great understanding to his grandson's life. He understood why the elfling was so cold and reserved as he faced task after task that any other elf would have long since faded from.

His respect grew after each task the young one passed, and grew from. Many a time he had felt guilty for watching the things Elerossë had tried so hard to hide from his family.

"Did you tell anyone else?" Elerossë had asked the child.

"NO!" she said, suddenly fierce. "It was my own fault! I shouldn't have been so weak, I shouldn't have…" she was cut off as he pulled her to him again.

He pushed her back again and looked into her red eyes. "It wasn't you fault!" he cut her off as she started to speak again.

Elrond traded a tortured look with his father-in-law.

"It wasn't your fault! Listen to me Sheri. Was it my fault?" he asked.

All five men traded a confused look at the question.

"Was it?!" he demanded. "Was it my fault for what my uncle did to me?"

Elladan and Elrohir drew in shocked breath at the same time. Everything fell into place instantly. Elerossë's refusal to talk to the twins, or be alone with either of them. The slight flinches every time one of them tried to make him feel more comfortable around them. His cold rejection of them the first time he met them… It all made since.

"No…" Celeborn whimpered.

"Of course it wasn't your fault! You were only six!!" Sheri said back steadily.

"Oh Valar!" Elrohir murmured, feeling the bile rise in his throat. He felt his twin grip his hand and looked to see the same anguished look on his face.

"How many?!" Raven said harshly.

"What??" she asked weakly.

"How many where there?"

"F-five." She said, barely audible.

Raven's eyes closed tightly in pain. "Sometimes… Sometimes bad things happen to us." He said to her, voice distant with memories. "And there's nothing we can do to stop them… nothing we can do afterwards except try to get over it. But you can't forget, not ever. No matter how much you try, the memories follow you. The fear. The pain. The hate… Sher, the bad things aren't your fault. And you have to try, no matter how much you want to give up… no matter how much it hurts, you have to keep going. Your one of the strongest people I have ever known, and if anyone can do it, its you."

Celeborn could feel the tears falling silently down his face, and did nothing to stop them as the felt a peace of his heart die at the unbearable pain emitting from the still, but unbroken form of his great-grandson.

XXXXXXXX

Review?


	12. Riot

Chapter 11

Riot

LAST TIME:

_Raven's eyes closed tightly in pain. "Sometimes… Sometimes bad things happen to us." He said to her, voice distant with memories. "And there's nothing we can do to stop them… nothing we can do afterwards except try to get over it. But you can't forget, not ever. No matter how much you try, the memories follow you. The fear. The pain. The hate… Sher, the bad things aren't your fault. And you have to try, no matter how much you want to give up… no matter how much it hurts, you have to keep going. Your one of the strongest people I have ever known, and if anyone can do it, its you."_

_Celeborn could feel the tears falling silently down his face, and did nothing to stop them as the felt a peace of his heart die at the unbearable pain emitting from the still, but unbroken form of his great-grandson._

XXXXXXXX

The sun was setting when they finally finished setting up the park. The gang's interments were on a slight raise, and a variety of speakers spread throughout the park with extension cords, in including six 500 watt PA stage speaker cabinets, two crate 300 watt guitar speaker cabinets and three Marshall MG Guitar Amplifier Half Stacks with MG100HDFX Head and MG412A Cabinets.

Justin had been in charge of spreading the word to the right people and expected a good turnout. Raven stood to look over the equipment. A pleased smile crossed his face and his hand came up to his face to bite the tip of his fingernail thoughtfully. He moved his hand and his lips moved silently. The notice me not charm- something that Hogwarts had actually taught him- went up around the expensive speakers.

The big clock in the center of the park chimed 11:00pm, and the band grouped up of the rise. At the last strike of the clock, the first strum of the guitars started. Almost instantly people started appearing from paths to surround the band. By the time the intro was over there was already over twenty people there.

If you feel so empty  
So used up, so let down  
If you feel so angry  
So ripped off so stepped on

Their voices were full of passion, the lyrics showing exactly what they thought of the newest laws, of the scorn they received for something they couldn't control.

You're not the only one  
Refusing to back down  
You're not the only one  
So get up

They were showing that they weren't alone… that there we a ton of others that lived just like them.

Let's start a riot, a riot  
Let's start a riot  
Let's start a riot, a riot  
Let's start a riot

By then, there had to have been over a hundred teenagers there. They surrounded the rise, one huge mass of bodies. But as one mass, they were also divided. There were clear lines between the gangs- a group of kids all wearing orange bandannas; another that were all wearing the same black style shirt. Then the subtler ones- a group with the same earring worn in their left ear; a group with the same style hair cut. There were some gangs you couldn't tell were together if not for the closeness and protectiveness the protruded to each other.

If you feel so filthy  
So dirty so fucked up  
If you feel so walked on  
So painful so pissed off  
You're not the only one  
Refusing to go down  
You're not the only one  
So get up

The rest of Ravens' gang stood together as one of those gangs. The symbol of their family was the dragon tattoo hidden by cloths, but the stood as one of the strongest groups there- even with no visible physical similarities.

Let's start a riot, a riot  
Let's start a riot  
Let's start a riot, a riot  
Let's start a riot

The energy was practicality exploding from the people. They jumped in union, fists pounding the air. Raven was jumping as well, sweat starting to bead his skin. The players fingers flew over strings and keys, pounded drums and screamed the lyrics.

If you feel so empty  
So used up, so let down  
If you feel so angry  
Just get up

Raven glanced up when he heard the sirens over the pounding base. A smirk crossed his face as he saw the cops swarm the area, trying to get to them.

Let's start a riot, a riot  
Let's start a riot  
Let's start a riot, a riot  
Let's start a riot

Raven dropped the guitar to hang by the strap. His hand came round to hold the mic placed in front of him. He pulled it from the stand and held it in one hand; his free hand came up to punch the air to the rhythm of the song. His body moved gracefully as he lost himself to the beat.

The last word was screamed and it was over. Raven stood breathing hard, head bowed, and body glistening in sweat. His head finally came up, green eyes locked on the cops trying to push their way through the crowd. He started walking down towards the one that looked like the person in charge. The crowd parted for him, where it had been stopping the cops.

He stopped directly in front of him, looking straight into the other's murky brown eyes. His expression was blank as he raised one eyebrow elegantly. "You're under arrest." The officer said flatly.

Raven smiled- barely a curve of his lips, but a smile all the same. "Oh?" he asked innocently. "On what charges??"

"Rioting, gang membership, and public disturbance, to name a few."

Again, Raven smiled. "Really?" he questioned slyly. "Could you explain the charges...? Please?" the question was clearly mocking, and the officer frowned in confusion.

"You are starting a riot, clearly." He said shortly. "This" he gestured to the kids around them watching curiously. "Is obviously a gathering of gangs. And it is 11:00 at night. People are trying to sleep, not be serenaded by this racket."

Ravens face took on an enlightened expression. "Humm…" he spoke in acceptance, causing his gang to look at him in concern. "That I understand, but I'm afraid you're incorrect."

The cop looked at him scornfully. "And how, exactly am I 'incorrect?" he spat arrogantly.

Raven looked at him in fake offence. "Well, isn't it obvious? We're not rioting! I do believe, correct me if im wrong, but isn't the definition of 'riot' "a noisy, violent public disorder caused by a group or crowd of persons, as by a crowd protesting against another group, a government policy, etc., in the streets." This isn't violent, and we're not protesting anything! We're simply peacefully gathering, as is our constitutional right! To witness and perform a small street concert- in warm-up for our big concert in a few weeks, of course."

By then the other cops had reached them. A few Raven recognized, but others were unfamiliar to him. "And how do you explain your way out of a group of gangs?" the man demanded, silently admitting defeat for the first one.

"Gangs?!" Raven exclaimed in shock. He looked around in confusion, adapting the perfect, butter-wouldn't-melt expression. "Sir, these kids arnt in a gang!"

"Then explain the symbolism of their wardrobes." He demanded in satisfaction.

Again, Raven looked silently around the group. His eyes came back to the man in front of him. "I know. You older people don't really approve of the fashion trends of today's youth… but that's all it is. You know, when one person starts something, it catches on fast, then everyone's doing it! Its like a chain reaction- you cant stop it once it starts…" he trailed off sadly. Raven could hear the stifled chuckles and amusement coming from the gangs still watching.

"Be that as it may." The man said, voice full of unquenchable rage, "you are disturbing the peace, and that is a crime."

"Sir, with all do respect," Raven paused as a couple people went into a full blown laughter. "This isn't a residential area, but a public park. I very much doubt that this slight commotion will even reach the closest housing area, especially over the noise of the highways and drive-by's that are bound to happen on a night such as this. I cant help but wonder, why are so many of you 'gentlemen' attempting to break up our little gathering, when you could be out stopping those drive by's and saving lives?"

The man glared into Ravens defiant eyes. "The idiots that involve themselves in drive by's are scum, and if their stupid enough to engage themselves, they have to face the consequences."

For the first time that night, Raven lost his composure and his face shone with pure rage and hatred. Hisses came from the crowd and Raven had to restrain himself from lashing out at the man.

"If we get word of one more disturbance, you will all be thrown in prison." The man stated, walking calmly away. He was almost out when he suddenly found himself face down on the ground. The kids around him when he fell turned back to the front to hide their laughter as the other cops rushed forward to help him up, only to find themselves falling as well.

The finally all got up and gathered themselves. "What was that?!" the lead cop demanded, face an ugly shade of crimson.

Raven turned back around once more. "The ground is really uneven here… you've gotta watch where you 'step.'" You could hear the victory in Raven's voice as he walked away, his gang following faithfully behind him, and the others' making their own way out, leaving the group of cops standing in an empty park with nothing to show.

XxXxXxXxX

HEY GUYS!! An update! Happy Turkey day for all you Americans! For all you reading "Desert Protectors" The next chapter is done, im just waiting to get some words back from someone that's translating for me… :) so it should be up soon!!


	13. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

LAST TIME:

Raven turned back around once more. "The ground is really uneven here… you've gotta watch where you 'step.'" You could hear the victory in Raven's voice as he walked away, his gang following faithfully behind him, and the others' making their own way out, leaving the group of cops standing in an empty park with nothing to show.

XXXXXXXX

The days pass quickly after that, filled with sluggish days and fun nights. Raven didn't do anything to extreme, having mostly lost the thrill of it after having been in middle earth for three years. They would go to a bar, or a mild club, or even just stay home and play poker.

After almost two weeks of the blissful lifestyle, Raven started getting odd feelings. He knew that he wouldn't be able to stay much longer before the spell that sent him there retired. He told Sheri. She was upset, but understood that he had a family he needed to go back to.

XXXXXXXX

Raven put a hand lightly on Sheri's shoulder. She turned her head to see who it was, and, recognizing the look in his eye, followed him silently. They went to Ravens' bedroom, and shut the door behind them. Raven plopped down on his bed, watching as Sheri sat comfortably in the only chair in the room.

He rolled on his side, reaching under his pillow to grab a thick envelope. "I have to ask you something, and I want you to be completely honest." Raven told her seriously.

Sheri nodded her head, looking concerned. "When I'm gone, are you going to get the fuck out of here and take care of your baby, or are you going to stay here and raise it to be just another dead gang member on the streets?"

Sheri gasped, eyes filling with hurt and disbelief that he would say something like that to her. She opened her mouth twice before she could actually say something. "You…You bastard!" she exclaimed angrily. "You should know, better than anyone, that I don't want to raise my baby here!" she shook her head, sending loose blond hair flying. "But it's not like I have a choice! We're not here because we like it, you jack ass. We're here because we don't have anywhere to go." Her voice grew softer, filled with self loathing. "It's not like I could do anything. I haven't ever gone to formal school, nobody would hire me, I don't have any money, and no way to get it; well, no way that would be better than this life…"

Raven stood up and walked over to her. He pulled her up and into a hug. "That's what I wanted to hear." He whispered into her hair. Sheri pulled back to look at him in confusion.

"What are you talking about?" she asked defeated.

He handed her the envelope silently. She took it with shaking hands. She pulled open the flap and gasped in shock as she pulled out the stack of hundred dollar bills. "Ray…" she whispered. "What… where…" she couldn't finish her sentence.

He reached out and closed her small hands around the money. "There's three thousand dollars there." He started quietly. "I've had it stashed at Manuel's in case. Sheri, that won't last you long after you have the baby."

"But wont you need it?" she asked him.

Raven shook his head silently. "I'm leaving soon Sher. And I don't think _I'_m coming back this time." He paused as tears started falling down Sheri's face. "That's not all…" he looked hard at her. "Are you willing to work, and I mean really work?"

"Yes…." Sheri whispered painfully.

"Manuel is willing to have you trained as his personal secretary. His legal secretary. You won't deal with his more… questionable… business, and after you actually start working for him, you'll make good money. Enough to get yourself a decent apartment, and take care of your baby. But Sheri…" Raven trailed off…. "You… You've got to promise me to try you best, ok? To take care of yourself."

Another tear fell down the pale face and she wrapped her arms around his thin shoulders, money clenched in one hand.

XXXXXXXX

The warm heat of the day assaulted Raven, even as he pulled on his black hoodie. He wasn't dressed for Arizona, but rather for the cold climate of Scotland. He wore form fitting black jeans that showed off his toned legs and lean muscles. He had a dark red, long-sleeved shirt under a black hoodie. The hoodie had a copy of his dragon tattoo drawn across the back in fierce colors. With a sigh, he pulled a plain red baseball cap down low over his head and his hood up over the top of that. 

He looked around his empty bedroom once before he apparated away. He didn't go far, appearing at the entrance to Phoenix's magic center.

Once he had gathered his bearings, Raven walked to his right, making his way towards the shop he needed.

XXXXXXXXX

Raven appeared outside the wards on Hogwarts. He slipped his newly purchased international portkey into the pocket of his sweatshirt, pausing only long enough to ensure it wouldn't be lost.

He walked slowly up the remaining path to the enormous building, both dreading and accepting the upcoming meeting. The school year would finish in five days, and Raven was confident everyone he needed to talk to would be there.

The journey passed far too quickly, and before he realized it Raven was walking the last few feet to the headmaster's office.

He didn't bother to try and find the password, but rather knocked loudly on the statue. The moments passed silently, and Raven started to wonder weather or not he should leave.

Just as he turned to walk away, the statue moved aside, and the stair way beckoned to him. He paused unsurely, but, after taking a deep calming breath, made his way up the stairs.

XXXXXXXXX

Raven looked around the large office silently. His 'grandfather' had been relieved to see him, opening his arms in welcome when Raven had appeared. His blue eyes dimmed when Raven refused to embrace him, but still glowed with relief and happiness.

He had been quick to summon James, Lily and Jessy, and to tell the deputy headmistress that he would be busy, and he wasn't to be disturbed.

It had only taken about ten minuets for them all to gather in the office. Lily and James sat together on a summoned loveseat, and Albus sat behind his desk. What drew Ravens eyes weren't any of them, though, but rather Jessy. His brother sat away from the rest of them, choosing a chair in a far corner of the room.

He sat with his head bowed, not looking at any of them, and Raven couldn't help but feel some sorrow in his chest as he looked at him. Where the adults got close to him, trying fruitlessly to gain his attention, Jessy sat silently, having given up on knowing his brother.

XXXXXXXX

It was two hours later that the people finally reemerged. James was the first one down the stairs, his face a pasty white color. Lily followed behind him, silent tears running down her face. Albus came next, and while he looked somewhat older, he held a sense of peace around him.

Back up in the office, Raven couldn't help but feel somewhat guilty. He pushed the emotion aside roughly- he had given everyone closure, there was no reason to feel guilty… his green eyes glanced around the room to see his brother still in the same position he had been in.

Raven walked silently over to him and laid a gentle hand on his shoulder. Jessy jumped, his brown eyes locking instantly with Ravens' green. Jessy only managed to hold the gaze for a moment before he dropped his eyes and looked around the otherwise empty room.

"Sorry." The younger of the two whispered quietly, standing to leave the room.

Raven watched him move silently, but as he went to leave the office, Raven's hand shot out to grab the other man's arm.

The sad hazel eyes locked on his and Raven stood frozen for a long moment. He opened his mouth to speak, but before he could, his brother interrupted desperately.

"Don't… Just don't say anything." he pleaded with his green-eyed counterpart. "I know what you're going to say; that you don't want a brother… just don't make me hear you say it."

Raven's grip tightened in pain as he felt the long ignored twin bond flair between them. "Jessy…" Raven trailed off uncertainly.

Jessy clenched his eyes shut, trying desperately to block out what was happening. "I just want to know one thing." Jessy begged quietly.

Raven didn't answer vocally, but with his expression. "What did I do to make you hate me so much? I mean, I know you grew up different than me, and I know I'm practically a stranger to you, but why do you hate me? Did I do something? I can fix it; just tell me what to do!"

Ravens looked closely at his brother and realized that, while he himself had ignored and blocked out the effects of their bond, Jessy hadn't. His brother had felt all the years of grief, knowing his twin was alive somewhere, and hurting, but not being able to do anything about it.

The realization shook Raven to the core, and he stood frozen. Jessy, misinterpreting his silence, felt his face fall as he desperately tried to hold back the tears so full of repressed emotions; pain, shame, loss, grief, despair, hopelessness, hope, and finally defeat.

It was the first clear drop that fell down his cheek that snapped Raven out of his shock. Jessy tried to turn his face away in shame, not wanting the man to see his weakness.

Raven, still holding his arm, moved to stand in front of him. His free hand reached out and gently turned his twin's face toward him. Raven's persistence caused more tears to join the first, and Raven felt like the biggest asshole in the world.

Moving on instincts alone, Raven drew his brother to him in a stiff, but warm embrace. "I… I never hated you." Raven said shakily. "I just… don't like them."

Jessy felt his legs give out, and he clenched his fists in the thick fabric of Raven's sweatshirt. Raven never shed a tear; he just sat silently, holding the other man to himself reassuringly.

Raven wasn't sure exactly how long they had sat like that, but he finally drew back and looked his brother in the face. Jessy met his look, only his eyes were red, with dried tear marks on his tanned face.

Raven ran a calming hand through his hair, the same way he did to Sheri on occasion, and opened his mouth to speak. "Are you doing anything today?" he asked, lacking his usual confidence. Jessy shook his head silently. "Would you… I mean, do you want to… uh; do you want to come hang out with me for a while? We can go to McDonalds or something."

Jessy stared at him in confusion, and Raven felt his heart sink, so he did what came naturally to him; he brushed it off. "Not that it matters. I'm going to be gone soon anyways."

"Really?" Jessy asked self-consciously. Raven nodded his head, hiding his relief. "Ok… but…" Raven looked at him, waiting for his brother to refuse him. "What's McDonalds?"

Ravens gasp of outraged disbelief drew an unwilling laugh from Jessy, and he stood from his brother's embrace, silently reaching out a hand to pull him to his feet.

Together they made their way from the empty office, talking and joking together for the first time they could remember.  
XXXXXXXXX

Well? There's for all you who wanted Raven to forgive Jessy… This isn't beta'd, and I dead tired, but I want to get this up anyway.

Please review and tell me what you think! Legolas should appear in the next chapter!


	14. Chapter 13

OMG! I am so sorry for the long wait! It's my senior year, and I have had NO TIME between all my projects and my job… but I graduate soon… yesterday was my last day of high school!! I'm so excited! Anyways, here's the chapter you've been waiting for!!

Cookies to anyone who can tell me what movie this chapter is from. :D

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, or anything else you recognize in this story.

Last time:

Raven ran a calming hand through his hair, the same way he did to Sheri on occasion, and opened his mouth to speak. "Are you doing anything today?" he asked, lacking his usual confidence. Jessy shook his head silently. "Would you… I mean, do you want to… uh; do you want to come hang out with me for a while? We can go to McDonalds or something."

Jessy stared at him in confusion, and Raven felt his heart sink, so he did what came naturally to him; he brushed it off. "Not that it matters. I'm going to be gone soon anyways."

"Really?" Jessy asked self-consciously. Raven nodded his head, hiding his relief. "Ok… but…" Raven looked at him, waiting for his brother to refuse him. "What's McDonalds?"

Ravens gasp of outraged disbelief drew an unwilling laugh from Jessy, and he stood from his brother's embrace, silently reaching out a hand to pull him to his feet.

Together they made their way from the empty office, talking and joking together for the first time they could remember.XXXXXXXXX

Chapter 13

The walk passed in companionable silence. The two brothers had gotten a portkey back to Phoenix. Raven couldn't hide his amusement when the heat almost instantly bowled over Jessy, who was use to the much cooler weather of England. They made their way from the portkey destination, and out into muggle Phoenix. Like promised, Raven took his brother to McDonalds.

Jessy let out a sigh of relief when they entered the air conditioned building. They made their way to the register and Jessy looked cluelessly at the boards full of choices. "Haven't you ever had any fast food before?" Raven asked as the line moved closer. Jessy shook his hear wordlessly. A smile split Raven's face against his will… maybe having a brother wouldn't have been so bad after all.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Jessy and Raven had been in the restaurant for almost an hour. They had talked about a lot of different things, but really nothing at all. Sometimes though, Jessy would say something off the wall and make Raven feel like a complete ass, without meaning to at all. Of course, with them being so close, Jessy would pick up on those feelings, and then feel guilty. Neither of the brothers enjoyed the actual food very much though. Raven had found that, especially since he had gone to live with his family, he had enjoyed grease and meat less and less. Jessy was use to the Scottish foods commonly eaten at school. Finally they had simply settled for a hot fudge Sunday and Mcflurry. It was closing when the two finally left.

XXXXXXXXXXX

Raven was walking through the busy, crowed sidewalk. He blended in with the crowd- neither standing out or going against the flow of tightly pressed bodies. He moved for an unknown amount of time, merely drifting with the movements. Raven was in a haze. His thoughts were mixing and meshing around in his head, jumping from one subject and one worry to another. His cell phone had gone off a couple of times, but he made no move to answer. Suddenly he felt a hand grasp his wrist and he turned his head to see who it was.

Sheri's anxious face greeted is and his mind snapped from the haze it was under. She didn't say a word, but simply started leading his quickly through the bodies. They pushed and shoved their way through, no longer flowing but fighting against the current. They finally broke out onto a smaller, less used street. Sheri didn't stop like Raven thought she would have, but kept pulling on his arm. She finally stopped in front of a large warehouse that Raven recognized as a well know chop shop. Sheri didn't go over to the doors but ran around the back to the fenced off area behind the building. She quickly located a gap and squeezed through with a skill that showed she had done it before. Raven followed more wearily and somehow wasn't too surprised by the sight that greeted him.

Seven men stood around in a semi circle around one smaller man. The seven all had guns held loosely in their hands, more of a warning than an actual threat. The man in the middle Raven recognized instantly. His name was Emilio Adalberto, an occasional associate of Manuel. The next thing that caught his attention was a car sitting inside a car crusher, or rather, the man unconscious in the drivers seat. Ross was leaning against the window, eyes closed and hands handcuffed to the steering wheel. Suddenly bright lights flared against the darkened sky, shining directly on the car Raven was studying. The man behind the glass flinched against the bright light, and his head lifted away from the glass. Raven saw the exact moment when Ross realized he was stuck as the panic flared across his face and he tired to forcefully jerk his wrists away from the steering wheel.

"Raven." a voice said almost welcomingly, pulling his attention from his friend to Emilio. "Long time no see, non?"

Raven didn't answer, but looked directly at the older man. Finally, after several seconds silence Raven spoke up. "What exactly am I here for?" he asked quietly.

Emilio smiled slightly. "Straight to business then?" he asked, "Well its simple. Your friend over there owes me a lot of money. Now I'm a good man, and I've been very patient with him, but my patience wears thin."

Raven continued to look at him blankly. "What dose him owing you money have anything to do with me?" The man smirked and Raven felt the smallest shiver go down his spine- he knew he wasn't going to like what was said.

"You did take responsibility for your… family… did you not?" he asked with a curious eyebrow raised.

Raven looked at the man distrustfully and thought about the question. He had voluntarily taken the blame for his gang numerous times in the past, and would do whatever it took to keep them safe- even if he technically wasn't the leader anymore. On the other hand, Ross had been a pain in his ass since he had come back.. But was he really willing to let the young man die because of that? No…. he wasn't. no matter how Ross had been acting, he was still family and Raven would accept that. "I did." Raven finally answered.

Raven saw satisfaction flash through the cold gray eyes briefly before it disappeared. "Then the way I see it, I have been more than patient with your friend, and I'm not willing to wait any longer. Either you get me the money he owes me, or we kill him… slowly." Raven glared at the man spitefully.

"And how do you presume I get his money… I know you wouldn't bother with me over a small amount, and I'm not exactly rolling in the cash."

The man smirked again and Raven had the urge to take a step back as the man moved forward. Emilio reached out a cold hand and ran a single finger down the side of his face, starting at his eyebrow and ending on his lips. "I know a way _you _could make a lot of money _very _quickly." The man spoke so only the two of them could hear and it was clear to Raven what he was talking about when the eyes moved slowly down his body.

Raven snorted rudely. "I'll never be a whore." he said in the same tone as Emilio.

The older man smiled again. "You already are." the man said before mockingly kissing the corner of his mouth. Raven finally reacted. His hand moved like a blur to the back of his jeans and before anyone could react, had a gun pointed directly between the mans eyes. Almost instantly all the other men had their guns pointed right at Raven, while one man walked calmly over to a large switch. When Emilio nodded the man flipped the switch. Instantly a loud grinding noise came on and the vice around the car began to lower. Raven's head snapped over to see Ross wake with a start and instantly begin to panic.

"The way I see it," The elder man started, "you have three choices. One, you refuse right here. I kill you, then I kill her, and he dies anyways." he said nodding to him, Sheri, and Ross as he mentioned them. Ravens eyes darted to where the car continued to be forced down.

"HELP!! SOMEONE, PLEASE HELP ME!" Ross could be heard screaming from inside the car.

"Choice two, you agree to get me my money but lie. I hunt you down and kill you, her, him, and anyone else who happens to be around at the time."

"RAVEN PLEASE!! GOD SOMEONE!! OWWW! PLEASE!"

"And choice three. You agree, and you make some money. I'm happy and you all stay alive. Everyone wins."

"HELP ME!! AHH, FUCK! ITS CRUSHING ME! PLEASE!!"

Raven's eyes flickered around the scene helplessly. He locked on Sheri's scared face and over to where the car was getting small and smaller. Finally he dropped his gun in defeat. Emilio smiled and the crushing sounds immediately stopped. "I look forward to doing business with you in the future." The man ran his tongue over his full lips and Raven couldn't help but cringe slightly in disgust. With a motion of his head the yard cleared out, leaving only Raven, Sheri and Ross.

Raven stood by blankly as Sheri hurried over to the partially crushed car and struggled to open the door. The finally got Ross out by kicking out what was left of the windshield and him crawling through the small space. Ross limped over to Raven. He stood uncertainly in front of him as Raven's gaze unwaveringly held his own. "Thanks" He finally murmured. Raven nodded without a word and with one last look at him, Ross and Sheri left through the hole in the fence."

Raven's eyes looked to the sky and he sighed heavily. "Life would be so much simpler if I just stopped saving his ass…" he spoke to the inky blackness.

XXXXXXXXX


	15. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Raven rolled onto his side, and then further until he was sitting on the edge of the small bed, finally giving up on the battle of sleep. He dropped his head into his hands and sighed. Raven knew his time in the world would be ending soon, but he still had so much to do. He had to meet with Charley- which he still hadn't done, he had to get enough money for his gang to keep going on their own once he left, on top of the money to pay off Ross, he had to make sure old 'friends' knew he was leaving so they didn't come looking for him once he was gone, he had to….. God, just too much stuff to do.

At least he knew the kids' education would happen. He had learned a couple weeks ago that one of his missing members, a kid named Joel, had gotten a small trashy apartment near a school. The problem up until this point wasn't that they didn't want an education, but rather the fact that they didn't have the right stuff- A verified address, legal contacts, a phone number… the list went on.

It wasn't a place anyone would really want to live, but it gave them a legal address for the youngest of their family to attend school if they wished. It also had a good landline with voice mail as a number for the forms. It was a step in the right direction at least, and gave Raven some hope for them once he was gone.

He had accomplished a lot since he had been back however. He had made peace with his twin brother, and they had ended on good terms. He had gotten Sheri secured in a good job that would help her take care of a young child and support herself reasonably well without resorting to anything illegal like so many of them had to before. He was going to accompany her to her ultrasound later that day and be with her when she found out the gender of her first child. It should have been Ross, it should have been the father of her child that was there for that first important step in his child's life… but Ross was still being an asshole and Sheri didn't want anything to do with the man. Raven didn't blame his sister. His one-time friend had changed in the time he had been gone- and it wasn't for the better like some of the others had.

That was the one thing Raven was looking forward to that day. He was excited to get to experience this, especially since he wouldn't be with her for the rest of the pregnancy or the growth of her child- this was probably the last big thing in her life he would take part in.

XXXXX

Raven stayed close to his sister as they walked into the crowed free clinic where she had been going. The white walls had turned a dirty brown with questionable stains littering the old paint, the floor was stained a darker mud color from a lack of sweeping. Pregnant women were lined up hip to hip around all available seats. Some were sitting on the dirty floor themselves, and some were leaning against the walls.

Raven noticed with little surprise that out of maybe fifty women, there were a total of four men- himself included. The two of them made their way up to the counter to tell the unaffected receptionist that they were there for Sheri's appointment. Raven leaned lazily against the filthy wall and looked around the room. Some of the women were large, and obviously due soon, while others weren't visibly with child. Some of them were holding small children on their laps, or had them sitting on the floor in front of them- in some places there were two or three children crowed around one woman.

He noticed that most of them had at least one tattoo visible- ranging from bold offensive ink to smaller, delicate butterflies. Some had brightly dyed hair, but just as many had normal, natural colors. Some had clean, makeup-less faces, and some had an obvious make up tone on that Raven could guess their profession. Some were cold and closed off, but some looked terrified, and were shooting nervous glances around the room, some were completely unaffected. None of this was new to Raven- he had lived in places like this for a good portion of his life, and had seen women in much worse conditions than what was available in the small room.

He led Sheri over to a small table that had been pushed against a wall and sat down on top of it without hesitation. He wiggled both to make himself comfortable and to make sure the table was sturdy enough to hold them both. Once he was sure it was safe, Raven pulled Sheri up and onto his lap. She made herself comfortable and they settled in or the long wait.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

It was nearly three hours later that they we're called and lead into a small room. The nurse had stopped along the way and gotten Sheri's height and weight, as well as asked her the usual questions once they had arrived in the room; 'taking any medication,' 'any abdominal pain,' things like that. Raven stood silently behind the girl throughout the preliminary questioning, and followed as she was led out of the office and into the ultrasound room.

It took a further twenty minutes for the doctor to enter the room. She was a merry looking woman that spoke cheerfully from the moment she entered. She chattered as she prepped the machine and had Sheri lie back against the bed. Her shirt was lifted up under her breasts, leaving her rounded stomach exposed.

The doctor dropped a small amount of jelly onto her stomach and smeared it with the end of the machine.

"It's so good to see the father involved for a change…" She rattled off. She must have noticed Sheri tense up and shoot a surprised look at Raven but she didn't make it motion to acknowledge it. Raven met Sheri's eyes, and simply nodded to the doctor in recognition. Sheri continued to look at him with a probing, questioning air clear for him to see, but he simple continued to look calmly at the screen now displaying the black and white picture within the triangular shape.

"Ahh, there's a hand…" he said pointing to a blob on the screen. She slowly moved the point around on Sheri's stomach. "There's the head right there…" both Raven and Sheri were completely focused on the picture, unmoving except their eyes. "Would you like to know the gender?" the doctor asked cheerfully. Sheri nodded uncertainly, knowing that after this everything would be real. It wouldn't simple be a thing in her stomach- it would be a real living baby, her son or daughter. After this she would have to start thinking about the future. Sure, she had already gotten a great job thanks to her best friend, and she would raise the child- but beyond that, the baby was fictional. It was a ghost, something to be mentioned, something that existed within her, but something that wasn't truly there, something…. Her thoughts were interrupted as the doctor spoke. "It's a boy!" and that one sentence changed her whole future.

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It was nearly a week later that Raven was putting the finishing touches on his money problem. He had decided, and the gang agreed, that the (legal) way for them to make the most money possible was a big blow out concert. They wouldn't go through their battle of the bands contacts, but through themselves. The theory was that if they used the big time music industry, they would take a portion of the profit. If the band completed everything themselves, they would be able to keep 100% of the profit. It was going to be huge. They would use an old warehouse for the actual concert, so they could control admittance at twelve dollars a head at the door- ten if they bought tickets early. They were going to publicize as much as possible that this would be the last time ever to see the band perform. With Kyle gone and Raven leaving they had decided to break up for good. The fans were fans of the old band, not whoever replaced the original. They were making t-shirts, hats and CD's both to sell, and to toss into the audience periodically.

The warehouse they had chosen was two huge empty rooms with one set of empty double doors in the middle of the wall. The room on the right was much smaller than the one on the left, and had a large desk completely covering one wall. The larger of the two rooms had two sets of metal stairs going up to a raised platform five feet wide that ran completely around the room, and rested about twelve feet up the wall. There was a rail that enclosed the metal walk, and it was perfect for what they had in mind. The final deciding factor had been the graffiti that completely covered the walls. Every color, signature, and size- everything was there. It was the perfect place for their final bang.

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Elrond sat silently in the room he had spent so much time in the past moons. He had watched his grandson where he was most comfortable, and he hated it. Elerossë was his little elfling. He shouldn't be doing any of the things he had watched him do. He should have been there, with his family. He should have grown up learning the ways of the court and the politics that went with it. He should have grown up knowing what was expected of him from birth.

Elrond wasn't sure how he was going to fix the mess. His grandson would be coming home soon, and he knew he would have to talk to the child. He needed to be honest about some things, and he knew Elerossë wouldn't be in the least bit happy about the news Elrond had to give him. By the Valar! Elrond wasn't even sure if the elf and his family even wanted to continue the contract after seeing some of the things Elerossë had done. Some points had already been broken before the elfling had come back to Rivendell. The child defiantly wasn't a virgin! He wasn't meek or submissive. He didn't act like the prince the family was expecting him to be!

The lord of the valley wasn't sure how to fix this, but he knew he needed to do something soon.

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Sorry guys… I've kinda lost interest in this story, and I know a lot of readers have too…. I'm not going to abandon this story- I wouldn't do that to the people still reading, but I am going to try and wrap it up soon.

I've been swamped with college and work, plus everything else that's been going on. I'm really sorry this took so long! What do you think Elrond was talking about?? I want to hear your ideas!!

PS for all my DP readers out there- It will be updated soon! I'm going to start the next chapter now, so keep an eye out!

Thanks to all those of you that have stuck with this story. You're the reason I've kept writing.


	16. Up for adoption

I have decided, after a very long thought process, that I am going to put my stories up for adoption. I know there have been a couple of requests to adopt in the past, and I'm hoping there's someone that has ideas for the stories.

Frozen is up for adoption. The only thing I ask is that the person I decided to be Edward's mate stay the same. I'll give you the info if someone decides to adopt.

That Was Then, This is Now is also up for adoption. Honestly, you can take this story wherever you want. I ran out of ideas for it a long time ago. If you adopt TWTTIN, you can also take New Life and revamp it if you want to.

Desert Protectors is hard for me, because I actually have a basic outline of how the rest of this story will go. If someone wants to adopt I'll give you a (vague) outline of my ideas for it. If someone adopts this one please follow the outline, however loosely.

I know I promised never to abandon my stories, but Real Life is too much, and when I do feel like writing, it's the original story I'm working on. Sorry everyone.

Last thing. Please don't offer to adopt any of my stories if you can't finish them. I would also prefer someone who can update semi-regular, but I know RL gets in the way of that

If you're interested in adopting any of my stories please PM me.


	17. TWTTIN has been adopted!

That Was Then, This is Now has been adopted! By Ronwyn The Queen of Darkness. Her profile can be found here:

http : / www fanfiction .net/u/1059029/


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